Page 42 of All of Me

“Remember,” he says as he touches his forehead to mine, “I would never let anything happen to these girls. I hate Adam for the way he treated you, but I genuinely don’t believe he would mistreat the girls. I don’t know how to explain it, maybe it’s the dad in me, I’m not sure, but there’s something that tells me they will be safe with him.”

“Okay,” I whisper.

Owen presses a lingering kiss to my forehead before picking up the car seat again. “Let’s do this together.”

We make our way to the van, and I help Sara climb into her seat as Owen buckles Ruby’s car seat to the base. The heat from the vents is already cutting through the chill, and the sound of Sara singing to herself calms my nerves. How can I be upset over something that makes her little heart so overjoyed?

The car ride to Burlington is quiet, aside from Sara’s occasional chattering before she, too, drifts off to sleep. Owen rests his hand on my knee as I stare out the window, trying not to think too much about tonight.

When we pull into Adam’s driveway, Sara claps her hands excitedly.

I force a smile, unbuckling her from her seat before slipping her coat back on. “Come on, sweetie. Let’s get you inside.”

I asked Owen to stay in the van but he insists on helping me carry everything up the front steps of Adam’s house. The house we only briefly shared together that he now shares with his girlfriend Katie.

Owen grabs Ruby’s car seat and pink diaper bag while I lead Sara to the door. My heart pounds as I knock, the sound echoes in the quiet morning.

Adam answers on the first knock, his expression unreadable. He’s dressed in a sweatshirt and jeans, casual but put together. For a moment, we just stand there, the tension thick in the air.

“Hey,” Adam says, his eyes flicking between me, Sara, and Owen, lingering on Owen for a moment too long. His jaw tightens, but his voice remains even. “She’s excited.”

“Hi, Da Da!” Sara shouts, bouncing on her toes and reaching up for him.

Adam smiles then, a real one that softens his features, and scoops her up into his arms. “Hey, Princess. You ready for our big night?”

Sara nods enthusiastically, babbling about her favorite toys and asking if they can bake cookies. My stomach churns at the sound of her laughter. She’s so happy, so oblivious to the tension stretching between the adults in her life.

I glance at Owen, who gives me a small, reassuring nod. His calm steadiness keeps me from falling apart, even as the memories of my last confrontation with Adam flash in my mind. His raised voice. The way he’d tried to blame me for every shortcoming in our co-parenting arrangement. Would he let his temper get the better of him again, this time in front of the girls? Would he say something he shouldn’t, something Sara is too young to hear?

My jaw tightens as I push the thought away. I can’t dwell on what I can’t control.

“You didn’t have to bring Owen,” Adam says, his tone clipped.

“I asked him to come,” I reply, meeting his gaze without flinching. “I wanted the extra set of hands.”

His eyes narrow, but he doesn’t argue. Instead, he shifts Sara to his other hip and steps back to let us in. I adjust Ruby’s blanket as Owen steps inside behind me, carrying the diaper bag. Adam’s gaze lingers on him again, his lips pressing into a thin line.

The house feels too quiet, too polished. It’s a far cry from the life we once shared here, a life I no longer recognize. I glance at the spot in the living room where the girls’ toys are neatly arranged, their bright colors at odds with the sterile feel of the space.

Owen places Ruby’s car seat on the couch, and I crouch down to unbuckle her. She stirs slightly, her tiny fists clenching, but she doesn’t wake.

“She just ate before we left,” I say, my words tumbling out in a rush. “Her diapers and clothes are all in the bag, and her blanket is in there too. She likes to be swaddled when she sleeps?—”

“Callie,” Adam interrupts, his voice softer now, but firm. “I’ve got it.”

I freeze, my hands hovering over Ruby. Does he? I want to believe him, but the doubt claws at me, sharp and relentless. Will he know how to handle Ruby when she cries? Will he have the patience to calm her without snapping? And what about Sara? Will he talk about me in front of her, planting seeds of resentment she’s too young to understand?

I glance back at Owen, his presence like a lifeline. His eyes meet mine, and I find enough strength to straighten up and step back.

“Okay,” I say, my voice quieter now. “I’ll see you tomorrow when you drop them off. Please bring them home before dinner so it’s not too late.”

Adam nods, lifting Ruby carefully out of her car seat. He holds her against his chest, his movements gentle, and I feel a flicker of relief. Maybe he really does know what he’s doing.

Sara, oblivious to the undercurrent of tension, dives into her toy bin, giggling as she shows Adam a plastic dinosaur. I force myself to smile, even as my chest aches while we say goodbye to the girls.

“Let’s go,” I whisper to Owen, my voice barely audible.

He doesn’t hesitate, placing his hand on the small of my back as we head back to the van. I keep my head down, my heart racing until we’re back inside the vehicle.

---