Page 33 of All of Me

Okay. Just checking. Drive safe. Coffee’s on if you need it. Love you.

I stare at his last message, the knot in my stomach tightening. Owen doesn’t say things like “Are we okay?” lightly. He’s steady, sure, always. And the fact that I made him question that—even for a second—makes me feel like I’m failing him. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, willing myself to push past the guilt.

Me:

Love you more.

Owen:

Not possible.

Me:

Yes, possible. See you soon.

I set my phone down and start the van, the weight of the conversation with Owen looming larger now. I’ll make it right when I get home. I have to.

The house is warm when I step inside, but it does little to take the chill out of my bones. The soft murmur of the TV hums in the background, mingling with Sara’s giggles and Ruby’s quiet fussing. I close the door quietly, my fingers lingering on the handle for a second too long. My whole body feels heavy, like I’m wading through something thick and invisible. Before I can fully gather myself, Owen is there. He steps into the entryway, Ruby cradled against his chest, his eyes finding mine immediately. He doesn’t even have to ask—I can see the concern etched into his features.

“Hey,” he murmurs, reaching for me. His free hand settles against my hip, grounding me in the way only he can. “You okay?”

The question is simple, but it undoes me.

I shake my head, pressing my lips together. I don’t know how to answer.

Owen studies me for a long beat, his fingers tightening slightly. Then he dips his head, pressing a soft kiss to my temple. “Go sit down. I’ll be right there.”

I nod numbly and drift toward the kitchen, slipping into a chair at the table. The smell of dinner fills the air—roasted vegetables, something warm and savory. The table is already set. He even lit a candle. The lump in my throat swells. He always knows what I need before I do.

A moment later, Owen slides Ruby into her swing and joins me at the table, pulling his chair close. His forearms rest against his thighs, his hands clasped between his knees as he watches me carefully.

“You haven’t been yourself lately,” he says quietly. “I didn’t want to push, but… I’ve noticed.”

My stomach twists. I knew he’d picked up on it—Owen always notices everything—but hearing him say it out loud makes it feel more real. More undeniable. I hate that I haven’t been able to hide it, hate even more that he’s had to deal with it. I don’t want to be someone he has to tiptoe around. I don’t want to be a weight he has to carry.

I exhale shakily, my fingers twisting in my lap. “Dr. Everett thinks the birth control is making everything worse.”

His gaze sharpens, but he doesn’t say anything yet. He’s waiting—letting me get the words out at my own pace.

I swallow hard. “The mood swings, the exhaustion… the way I just feel like I’m drowning half the time.” My throat tightens. “I don’t want to be like this. I don’t want you to think—” I cut myself off before I say something I can’t take back.

Owen’s brows draw together. “Think what?”

That I’ve been awful to you. That I haven’t been enough. That you deserve someone who isn’t this much of a mess. I shake my head, staring down at my hands. “She wants me to stop taking it.” The words come out so softly I barely recognize my own voice.

Owen doesn’t hesitate. “Then stop.”

I lift my gaze to his, my breath catching at the quiet certainty in his expression. No hesitation. No frustration. Just… support.

My breath catches. “Just like that?”

His jaw tightens slightly, but his voice is steady. “If it’s hurting you, Callie, it’s not an option. Nothing is more important than you being okay.”

I let out a shaky breath, staring at my hands. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot,” I admit. “Not just since Ruby was born, but before that. I think… I think this might’ve been affecting me for years. I just didn’t realize it.”

Owen frowns, waiting for me to go on.

“When I was younger, I had these… lows,” I say, swallowing hard. “I didn’t understand them at the time. I thought I was just an emotional teenager, or that maybe it was just me. But looking back…” I trail off, shaking my head. “I started birth control in high school. And now, after everything with Ruby, it’s like I can finally see the pattern.”

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