Page 66 of In Flight

Even if his eternal devotion is what I want.

That’s the stuff of flighty daydreams. The heady, giddy heights of hopes and prayers. But life isn’t lived up there in the sky.

Life is lived down here on the ground, where relationships can’t always work out.

Tears are streaming out of my eyes again when Isaac finally straightens his arms to lift his upper body and meet my gaze. “Thank you, River. For what you gave me just now. And for everything.”

My face contorts with surging emotion. “Thank you. I’ll never forget you.”

“Me either.” His voice is hoarse. His features twist as he pushes himself up to a sitting position. After breathing heavily for a minute, he stands up. “I’ll leave now. While it’s good between us.”

“Okay. Thank you for coming by. For making this better.” I keep swiping tears away, but they won’t stop.

He jerks his head to the side with another ragged breath. Then nods. “I’m leaving now.”

A tiny flicker of my old spirit emerges through the aching fog. “Don’t forget to put on your clothes first.”

He huffs a few times as his shoulders shake. Then he turns away from me abruptly as his shoulders shake even more.

I’m silent until he gives a small half shrug and reaches down for his clothes.

When he’s dressed, he leans over to kiss me softly.

I lie in bed and watch as he walks away from me once more.

***

AT TWO IN THE AFTERNOONon Tuesday, I’m sitting on the floor of my living room, wrapped up in a velvet-soft fleece blanket and hugging my knees to my chest as I watch my show and occasionally eat another spoon of melting cookie-dough ice cream.

I’m already almost through the second season of a cheesy fairy-tale-themed television show.

I might feel better if I had the distraction of work, but months ago I thought taking the week after the wedding off from work was a good idea so I could rest and recover. That leaves me nothing but sweets and comfort shows.

I was hoping that each day would feel a little better, but neither yesterday nor today have been any better than Sunday night. All of it is terrible. I’ve lost Isaac, and I’ll never get him back.

What if I never feel this way about a man ever again? What if all I’m left with are comfortable, shallow relationships like with Cash or nothing at all?

I’m fast-forwarding through a scene I don’t like when my doorbell rings. For just a moment, I hope it’s Isaac, but something inside me knows it’s not. I heft myself up and go to open the door.

It’s Raven. Standing there and looking stylish but casual in her slouchy cropped sweater, man-style trousers, and designer ankle boots.

“Wh—” My mouth falls open, and I can’t complete the word.

“Aren’t you going to let me in?”

“Of course.” I step out of the way. “What are you doing here? You should be on your honeymoon!”

“We don’t leave until Friday. You know that.”

“Sure, but you should be with him. You just got married a few days ago.”

“I know. But you sounded terrible yesterday when we talked. I know you said it was nothing, but I don’t believe you. And everything is a mess at home. Mom is all twisted in knots over the fight. She really wants to apologize, but she doesn’t think you want to hear from her. And Dad keeps lecturing everyone on how we’ve never treated you right and we need to start making up for it. Right now.” She flashes a sheepish smile. “So I came to check on you.”

If I hadn’t been crying for two days straight, I might have cried again in response to all that information. Instead, I hug my chest and work my face as I process what she’s saying. What it means. “Really?”

“Yes, really. I’ve been a bitch and a major bridezilla lately. I know that. But you’re my sister. And I want you to be all right.”

I sniff a couple of times. “I think I’m okay.”

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