Page 18 of In Flight

“I know we have. I’m simply emphasizing one of my points from last time. Did Sophie enjoy it?”

“She did.” He runs a hand through his thick, wavy hair as if he’s not used to it being so short. “Of course, she was whispering with her friend half the time, so I’m not sure how much of it she was actually paying attention to.”

I peer at him, trying to read his face and figure out whether he’s amused or annoyed by that fact.

Maybe both.

“Well, since your intention in agreeing was to make her happy, you seem to have accomplished that much.”

“I guess.”

“That doesn’t sound very certain.”

“I don’t know,” he admits with a shrug. He slants his eyes at me and then forward toward the back of the seat in front of him. “Occasionally I feel like she’s as frustrated as I sometimes am.”

“Frustrated with what?”

“With trying to make me who she wants me to be.”

I think about that. My pulse starts racing the way it does when it feels like something big is about to happen. “Isn’t that what you said your mom did with your dad?”

“No. She loves him for who he is. She just wants to make sure he’s as good ahimas he’s capable of being.”

“Oh. I see.” My thoughts are a jumble, so I take a minute to sort them out before I respond. “Well, I guess the main question is if the person Sophie wants you to be is the person you want to be yourself. If it is, it might be kind of frustrating, but you’ll be together in working toward that goal. But if it’s not...”

I leave the rest of the sentence hanging. I’m uncomfortable saying it out loud, and he knows what I would have said anyway.

If she’s trying to turn him into someone he doesn’t want to be, his only choices are ending the relationship or submitting to being miserable for the rest of his life.

Surely he won’t choose that.

He’s silent, but it’s not because he’s trying to end the conversation. He’s thinking it through the way I am.

“Do you?” I ask at last.

“Do I what?”

“Want to be who she wants you to be?”

He licks his lips briefly. Takes a weird little breath. “I thought so.”

“And now?”

“Now I don’t think I do.”

Something thrills inside me.Thrills. It’s the only word to describe it. And it’s not from some weird, irrational possessiveness that doesn’t want him with another woman. It’s different. Deeper.

It’s wanting the best for him. And striving for a superficially social position that’s not a good fit isn’t the best for him. I’m absolutely sure of that.

He darts me another quick glance, like he said more than he intended and he’s checking my reaction.

I smile and shrug. “Well, I don’t know what to say. You know what you should do.”

“What are you going to do?”

“About what?”

“About your stalwart boyfriend who drags you to sports events and family barbecues.Moneyor whatever his name is.”

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