Page 118 of Crossing Lines

“Not because Frank wanted me to,” she explains. “I did it after some serious self-reflection. I’m not mentally ready to have a child.”

We have our issues, but I do sympathize. “Sorry.”

Shame masks her face. “I’d scooped semen from his condom and inserted it. Did it on a few occasions until I became pregnant.”

“Christ, Mom.” I arch over and massage my temples. “I can’t believe you did that.”

“I know it’s wrong. It’s why I’m working on myself with a therapist.”

Surprised, I snap my head to her. “Really?”

She nods. “I’m moving back to my old apartment. Don’t worry, I won’t ask you for money. My job promotion coversmy expenses there. I’ll remain single until I have a healthy relationship with myself.”

I squint at her. “Where did this sudden change come from?”

“The last time we saw each other. You looked so heartbroken after I shared the truth. When you left, I sat with it, replaying years worth of all the shit I’ve done. Then I cried for hours from shame.” Her voice cracks as tears escape. “I didn’t want to face it. I’d convinced myself it wasn’t bad because your grandparents raised you. But I neglected you, Davia. It wasn’t just about me being a kid. I could have done more. I should have bonded with you. Instead, my hurt from my dad kicking me out made me resent you. I treated you like a wallet and ignored you for toxic men. I even felt jealous of you for being so successful.”

“Mom…” I touch her hand between us.

She wobbles her head. “I’m so sorry for everything I put you through. You said you want us to have a better relationship. I’ll work hard to become better for you and me. That’s if… you’re not too disappointed in me.”

I start sobbing. “I still want that, Mom.”

She drapes her arm around me, and we cry while holding each other for a good minute.

“Guess I need to sit with your grandparents and tell them about the baby.”

“I’m sorry Shanae put you in that position.”

She shrugs. “It’s time to have an honest talk with them anyway.”

“You know, everyone misses you, Mom. They’re only upset you don’t visit more.”

Her head goes up and down slowly. “I’ll work on that too. Promise.”

She rarely uses that word, so I know she means it.

FIFTY-ONE

After a week of stealing time between work, Davia agrees to spend the weekend with me. She wakes me Sunday morning with a sensual kiss and the news she’s bringing me to family dinner.

My nervousness grows with the incoming evening. As we drive to her grandparents’ house, thoughts of my tattoos, selling dope, and pretty much how I’m a complete opposite of the previous man swarm my head. They probably have assumptions about me due to how things went down.

“Try to relax,” Davia says when I pull up at the two-story contemporary house. She reaches over to squeeze my hand. “My family will accept you.”

“Hmm.” I shut off the BMW. “Sure they don’t already judge my character for snatching you from ol’ boy?”

She snorts. “I was already on my way out. But the force between us gave me the nudge I needed.”

I squint at her while grinning. “The force, huh?”

She rolls her eyes playfully. “Come on. You’ll love my grandma’s cooking.”

Exiting the car, we interlock our hands and stride to the front door.

Davia leads me inside after knocking. “Hey, y’all.”

Everyone pauses their conversations. Davia’s mom and grandma stand from the sofa.