Page 94 of A Pretty Fixation

“JD…” She wraps her arms around me.

“He never saw me,” I whisper on her shoulder. “Notthen, and not now. It was always Dove.” I ease back from her. “I’m not evenupset with him. I’m sad for both.”

Her green eyes gleam with empathy as she wipes mytears with her fingers. “I’m sure Caleb will sort it out and move on with you.He lovesyou.”

“Hm.” I lie back on the bed. “I need to heal.Maybe a relationship isn’t a good idea after all.”

Scarlett frowns. “Try to sleep. I’ll stay withyou.”

“Thanks, Scar.”

“Of course, JD. I’m always here for you.”

She relaxes on the other side of the bed, and Iclose my eyes, hoping that when I wake, the horrible memories are back in thevault by some miracle.

Perhaps the universe will flip things around, andDove will be alive, even if it means Caleb will leave me and go to her. As longas he’s happy, I’ll try to be okay with that.

I’ll try.

I haven’t seen or spoken to Jordyn in two days.Every time I’m about to call her, I change my mind. My head is in a weirdspace, and I don’t know what to say.

“Your mom said you’ve been sitting in here sinceyou came home,” Dad remarks. He sinks into the chair in the corner. He has hissleeves rolled up, seeming tired from working all day. “How are you doing,son?”

I stare at all the trophies on the shelf whilewringing my hands. “I’m not sure how to answer that, Dad.”

“I can’t imagine how you feel. I want you to knowwe’re here for you.”

“I know,” I mutter.

“You have a match tomorrow. I’m sure the stress ofthe championship must be adding to things.”

I look at him. “Dad, a rep from Hartford soccerclub approached me about joining the team.”

He sits up straighter. “That’s great, son.”

“Is it? I mean, I said I’d work with you aftercollege, but playing soccer is...” I swallow hard. “It’s my dream. I still feelbad that I’m changing our plans, though.”

Understanding curtains his face. “Don’t, son. Goafter your dreams.”

I scowl. “I thought you wanted me to take oversomeday.”

Dad waves it off. “I want you happy. That meansmore to me than anything else.”

“But…isn’t that why you adopted sons?” I asksoftly.

“We just wanted children. You and your brother aregreat kids. You stole our hearts the moment we met.”

That makes me smile, and I think it’s the firsttime since learning of Dove’s death.

I glance at the carpet. “I don’t know what to do,Dad. I love Jordyn. I’ve never loved anyone so much. But I have this guilt likeI betrayed Dove by giving my heart away. I know that’s unfair, but it doesn’tchange the way I feel.”

“Sounds like you need closure,” he says. “Perhapsfinding a way to say goodbye to Dove will help you move forward.”

“I don’t know how to do that.” My voice cracks.

He draws closer to touch my shoulder. “I spoke toher parents. They’re open to you visiting. They’re out in Coventry.”

I sniffle and push down the ache. “I’ll considerit.”

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