Uncovering my face, I straighten and lean backagainst the headboard. “That was too close.”
He nudges my arm. “Um, I should probably get youplanb. Last night, we didn’t use any.”
I peer down at the sheets. “Oh. That’s… notnecessary.”
“Why? Did you just have your—no, wait, we’ve hadsex three nights this week, and I’ve been going down on you, so you didn’t getyour period yet. I know you’re not on birth control either. No, Toya, youdefinitely should takeplan b.”
“Varen,” I look up at him, “it’s okay.”
He crumples his brows. “Are you sure?”
I swallow hard and tell him the truth, “I’ve neverhad a period.”
“What?” He appears more puzzled than before. “Butyou’re seventeen. Shouldn’t you have by now?”
“I don’t, Varen.” My voice sounds small. “I can’thave kids.” For some reason, I never thought I’d tell a guy that until I wasolder.
“Oh.” Understanding replaces his bewilderment. Hetakes ahold of my hand.
“I know we’re young, but, when I first learnedabout it at fifteen, my mom told me not to mention it to my boyfriend if Ireally like him. She said it’d turn him off. Guess that always stuck with me.”
Varen shakes his head. “I’m not turned off. It doesn’tmake me like you any less, Toya. You’re still amazing to me.”
His sweet words always feel like a halcyon day.“Thank you. You’re pretty amazing, too.”
Placing a finger at my chin, he tilts my head backand kisses me.
“Hmm. I should go to my room before they come backand catch me.” I break away from him, climb out of his bed, and haul on mynightshirt.
“They’re meeting friends. Want to go somewhere?”
“Actually, I signed up for a campus tour of JohnsHopkins today at noon. I have to meet my high school counselor and some otherkids.”
He shrugs. “Okay. I’ll drive you. Then maybe wecan do something after?”
“Sure.” I snatch my underwear off the carpet.
“Hey,” he calls out as I turn to leave, “aren’tyou going to invite me to shower with you?” A sneaky grin follows.
“Oh, okay,” I say in a cute voice.
Varen shadows me downstairs to my room. We stripoff our clothes and shower together, making out here and there. I make sure tocheck my neck, but Varen’s always careful, leaving his marks in other hiddenplaces.
After breakfast, he drives to my high schoolbefore noon. The guidance counselor and a few other students are waiting by avan.
“What time is the group coming back?” he asks.
“Hm. Think around two o’clock. I’ll text you whenwe’re leaving.”
“Cool. Have fun.” He leans over and kisses me.
“Varen…” Surprised, I stare out the windshield,making sure no one saw.
He snorts. “It’s fine, Toya. No one knows mehere.”
I slouch my shoulders. “Still.”
The way he looks at me is breathtaking, it’s as ifhis piercing blues are seeing my soul. Angling his head, Varen brushes my cheekand says, “Let’s tell them at the end of summer. I’ll get an apartment by then,so they won’t be able to stop us from being together if it comes to that.”