Page 41 of Steps

Discreetly, we slip away from the party. Alison drivesto the harbor in her Jeep Wrangler. We buy ice-cream and wander along theboardwalk while eating.

It’s not too bad outside. The air is cool. Lots ofcouples and families around, enjoying the Friday night.

I find myself checking the time on my phone. It’safter ten. I wonder where Varen went.

“You looked like you wanted to get out of there,”Alison says. “I hate parties, too.”

That’s not why.

“Yeah, I’m socially awkward.”

She nods and sets her eyes back on her vanillaice-cream. “I’m happy my dad met your mom. I have to admit, it’s happeningfast, but they seem to genuinely care for each other.”

I shrug. “Guess so.”

A quiet air stretches between us. After a moment,she speaks again. “I hope you’re not too taken aback by my brother. He’s hadissues for a while. Ever since our mom died.”

“No, actually, I’m…”Crushing on him.“Worried about him. I can tell he’s sad. But instead of addressing it he’sdoing bad stuff to suppress the pain.”

Alison inhales and exhales intensely. “We tried tohelp. Dad got him into rehab last summer. He was okay for a while but wentright back to those habits within weeks of coming home.” She raises hershoulders in an exaggerated shrug. “I’m only home on weekends so I can’t reallybe there for him. But maybe you can.”

If she gets a glimpse of all the fantasies I haveabout her brother, she’ll think otherwise.

“Of course,” I tell her, breaking out of it. “Iwant to be friends. Varen’s not a bad guy. Something is intriguing about him.He draws you in.” A smile tugs at my lips, and I look over at the dark water tohide it from Alison.

“Yeah. V used to be so good at making us laugh. Ithink he just needs to heal.”

“Hmm.”

When we reach the end of the boardwalk, I ask her,“Do you know where Varen is right now?”

She heaves a harsh sigh. “Probably at Finn’s.”

“We should go there,” I blurt without thinking.“If he sees us, he’ll get annoyed and leave.”

Alison chortles. “So, you want to annoy him intochanging? I’ve tried that. Trust me, it doesn’t work. Only pushes him furtheraway.”

I glance at my melted ice-cream and tell herhonestly, “Just want to make sure he’s all right.”

She touches my arm and smiles at me when I lookup. “Let’s go home.”

Alison parks her jeep on the empty driveway. Varenstill isn’t home. Entering the house, we notice all the lights are off.

“Night,” Alison says and makes her way upstairs.

“Goodnight.”

I go down to my room, lying in bed to read afterchanging into my nightshirt.

The story has such a strong hold on me that it’smidnight before I finally decide to put the book away.

Just as I’m about to turn off the light, I hear shufflingat my door and open it midway to peek outside. I glimpse Varen as he turns toleave.

“Hey, what are you doing?” I whisper.

He stops and looks back sideways. “Sorry, I…” Hecan’t seem to get his words out, and he staggers in his steps.

“Did you take something?” I ask, feeling sad forhim.