Page 111 of Steps

Huffing with frustration, I spin and glare at him.“Why can’t you and everyone else understand? IloveVaren. The same wayyou love my mother, and the way you loved Varen’s mother before her. This isn’tgoing away. It’s not some stupid crush.”

“Fine.” He sighs harshly. “What is it like? I beteverything you say will define exactly what a crush is.”

I glance down and wipe my hands on my jeans, voicea close whisper as I speak. “You can’t define love. It’s actions and feelings,and I feel everything when I’m with him.” I pause as the different moments withVaren flow through my mind. “There are all these intense emotions—happy andsad—and Varen takes me from one to the next.” Looking up at Daniel, I ask,“Does that sound like a crush?”

Something flickers in his gray eyes. A sympatheticexpression twists his features.

Daniel gulps and skates a hand through his hair.Just as he’s about to say something, my mom calls out from the living room.“Honey, bring ice-cream please.”

“Yeah!” he yells back.

Twisting to me, Daniel says in a kind tone, “Youcan’t be with my son, Toya. It’s just not going to happen.” He goes to thefreezer to grab the tub of ice-cream. “It’d be nice if you joined us.” Then hewalks out of the kitchen.

If you tell a teenager no, they do it anyway.

I don’t care what they say. Every fiber of mybeing wants Varen. Nothing can stop my heart from loving him. It hurts too muchto try. So as soon as they’ve gone to bed, I’m going to my love.

26

11p.m. flashes on the clock next to my bed. I tossthe sheet aside, grab my sneakers and clutch, then quietly tiptoe down thepassage.

The house is dark. Hopefully, Mom, Daniel, andAlison are fast asleep by now. Reaching upstairs, my heart pounds wildly fromnervousness as I try not to make a sound while picking up Mom’s car keys.

Biting my lip, I unlock the front door and jog toher car, starting it immediately. I back down the driveway and take off, hopingthey haven’t heard a thing.

I draw deep breaths as I reach the stop sign atthe end of the street. My longing to see Varen strengthens me to keep moving. Idrive twenty minutes until reaching Hampden, slowing down outside thethree-story house.

My heart gallops as I spot Varen’s car on thedriveway. With any luck, the main door is unlocked.

The area seems peaceful. Not a lot of trees,mostly apartment-like houses that look similar.

I hurry from the car and make my way to Varen’sapartment. Relief crashes over me when I try the door. It’s open. I enter andclimb the wooden stairs to the second floor, heart whacking against my ribcagewith every step.

Reaching the door with 2A on the front, I bounceon my heels excitedly as I knock. When Varen opens the door, a joyful floodrushes my body.

“Toya…” His blue eyes brighten. A broad grinappears on his handsome face.

I chuck into his arms, and we kiss madly. It feelsas if an eternity has passed since we last saw each other.

Varen hauls me inside and locks the door. He easesme back to look at me, hands squeezing my body. “You’re really here.”

“Of course.” I laugh short. “Were you expectingsomeone else at midnight?”

“Not at all.” He chortles and caresses my face.“I’ve missed you.”

“Missed you more.”

Varen tows me in for a long embrace. He kisses theside of my head and breathes me in. A minute or two passes before we breakapart to look at each other again.

“How are you?” he asks. “How’s work with my dad?How’s… your mom and the baby?”

I shake my head. “I’m okay, considering. They’refine. Your dad keeps me busy at the office. How have you been? Are you eatingwell? How is work?” I look around the apartment. It’s cozy with a small couch,TV, kitchenette, and a bed and dresser on the other side. “Place looks nice.”

He shrugs. “It’s temporary. I’ll get somethingbetter once I’ve saved enough.” He gently brushes my cheek with the back of hishand. “I haven’t been okay, Toya. I miss my girl.”

The yearning in his gaze unravels me. I press mymouth to his and kiss him aggressively, tongues entangling in erotic war. Varentugs at my clothes, putting his hand under my blouse to feel my skin.Electricity courses throughout my body and I want him even more.

He tears his lips away and hauls my blouse over myhead. Then does the same to his t-shirt.

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