Page 162 of Steps

Alison pats my back and offers a supportive smile.

“Sorry, honey,” Mom says, a little too disappointed.

I wave them off. “It’s all right. I wasn’t goingthere anyway.” I look at Varen after saying that. His eyes are narrowed as iffiguring me out.

“Um, I should finish reading,” I say, staring backat the acceptance letter from UMD. “Need to know what they say aboutscholarships.” I continue reading to myself. My smile falters. “It’s onlypartial. Gran’s savings won’t be enough to cover the rest.”

Daniel touches my hand. “Don’t worry about that.I’ll take care of it.”

I frown. “But... I don’t—”

“It’s okay, Toya,” he insists. “I’m happy to doit. You’re a member of this family.”

“Thank you,” I tell him, feeling modest. “I reallyappreciate it.”

Alison hugs me again. “I’m so happy you got in.”

“Hmm.”

Varen has remained quietthe whole time. Whenhe inches closer to hug me, I glimpse a sad look in his eyes even though he hasa partial smile on his face. He kisses my cheek and wraps me in his arms aftercongratulating me.

My mind keeps me up that night. I’m lying in bedworrying about what will happen should Varen discover the other letter andlearn I’ve lied.

He hasn’t draped his arm over me like most nightseither. This time, he remains on his back with both hands at his sides.

I ease up and try to make out his face in the dark.His eyes aren’t closed.

“Can’t sleep?” I whisper.

He releases a deep sigh. “Have a lot on my mind.”

Reaching for his hand, I give it a gentle squeeze.

“How come you didn’t tell me you applied to UCLA?”he finally asks.

My body goes tense. “I just wanted to see. Doesn’tmatter anyway. I mean, I’m not going there.”

“Yeah, but—”

“You want to be with me, don’t you?” I mutter,sidling closer. I touch his chest.

“Of course I do, Toya.”

“Then that’s all that matters.” I swallow hardbefore telling him, “I love you, more than you can imagine.”

Varen covers my hand with his. “I love you, too,baby.” Then he leans over and kisses me tenderly.

We go to sleep entwined in each other’s arms. Mysecret is still safe.

40

Mom surprises me with a phone call on Christmasmorning, inviting us to the house. It’s our first holiday as a blended family,and with my love.

Alison oozes over the makeup kit I’ve gifted her.“Thanks, Toya. I needed a new one.”

“Sure thing,” I reply, smiling from ear to ear.

She hands me a gift in return, and I undo herfancy-looking wrapper. My eyes twinkle when I see the leather journal. “Aw,thank you, Ali. This is so nice.” I trace my fingers over the intricate flowerdesigns.

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