Page 120 of Roulette: The Madam

“With all due respect, Israel. I’m not worried about a single bitch on this planet, but I’m especially not concerned with a motherfucker that pushes drugs up their veins.”

I didn’t have a rebuttal. She dragged lotion down her right arm and began rubbing it in.

“Besides, you’re free to do whatever and whoever you want. We’re partners, too. We’re not committed.”

“Don’t piss me off, Princess.”

She shrugged. “Not my intention, but it is the truth.”

It was, but after the day we’d had, the last thing I wanted was to hear a reminder.

“A nurse, huh?”

“Yes.”

“A liability it seems.”

“Not at all. She gives the job the only piece of her that’s worthy of human interactions. Her twelve hour shifts are likely the only time she’s sober and free of narcotics. Sometimes when Malaya is at her home. But, if the urge gets intense, she folds.”

Roulette breathed out a deep sigh. “And, you’ve insisted she sober up?”

“So much I’m tired of hearing myself. I’ve never begged for anything in my life, but I’ve been begging Yara to get herself together since I found out her addiction was real.”

“She’s not ready.”

I shook my head. “She’s not ready.”

“Is she aware that her addiction is destroying her precious little girl?”

I nodded. “Yes. Yes she is. That’s why she’s here with me.”

“Then maybe she just needs a reminder. A constant reminder. A–”

“Princess, please.”

“That little girl cried from sun up ’til sundown today. You don’t get topleaseme, Israel. I’m not telling you that as a partner. I’m telling you that as a woman, one who is fighting for the woman that Malaya will become.

“The child she is now and the shit she’s going through now will directly affect her for the rest of her life, shaping her into a woman she had no business being. I can’t sit back and let her become a shell of her truest self because I’m overstepping a boundary.

“You have ignored every boundary I have since I met you. If you didn’t want me to step behind her then you shouldn’thave introduced me to her. Not the broken parts of her, at least. Malaya deserves so much more than she’s being given.

“Her mother is alive. She’s able-bodied. She is sick, not dead. The only person who can heal her is her. So, it is her I need to have a word with. It won’t be today.

“Hell, it likely won’t be this week or this month, but she will be hearing from me, Israel. Whether you’re still sliding in my guts or not. Because, my concerns aren’t conditional. They’re real.”

I’d learned something about Roulette very early on. There was no convincing her otherwise when she had her mind made up.

“I’m not one of the fake girl’s girl. I am an ally in every lifetime. Womanhood is my life’s work. I have a PhD as evidence. She’s destroying a perfectly well child. I would like to save her as many years of therapy as I can. She’ll need it, but not as intensely. Not as often.”

Instead of fighting with her, I accepted her offer to assist Malaya to higher grounds, even if that meant her bumping into Yara intentionally.

“Besides, her mother is a girl, too. She’s doing life for the first time as well. It didn’t come with a manual. She’s trying to navigate this fucked up world without a map.

“Maybe she needs to hear it from another woman that she needs to get her shit together.Thiswoman at least. Because, by the time I cut her loose, she’ll be in the first in-patient facility that will accept her ass.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet. I haven’t done the work.”

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