Page 6 of Loathe

I was going to have to change my number so that it would be hard for the monster to find me. Now all I cared about was having a safe roof over my head and I needed to get to the clubhouse before Tony changed his mind. I knew he could, especially if his bitch told him she didn’t want me there. I hoped he wouldn’t, because the last thing I wanted to do was go crawling back to the place I once called home and the man that had made me into the thing I hate most. I would never go back to that life. I’d kill myself first before that would happen. I would never do another thing that sadistic son of a bitch wanted me to as long as I lived.

The entire drive to the Midnight Saints clubhouse had me filled with fear and I kept looking in the rearview mirror hoping I wasn’t being followed by any of my father’s men. I had no idea why I still called him my father. He hadn’t been my father in a very long time, but I guessed it was because he was the only man that had ever been any kind of father to me, good or bad. I zoomed along the interstate and tried to get to my destination as soon as I could. I was terrified that I was going to be ran off the road and taken by his men. I sighed with relief as the city limits came into view, and I knew I only had a few more minutes on the road before I would finally be safe. But for how long? That would depend on how long Tony could stand to be around me and judging by our previous interaction, it wouldn’t be long at all. I just hoped I could convince him otherwise.

I sighed with relief as the clubhouse came into view and I turned onto the street that led to the back of the clubhouse. I could feel the relief wash over me as I saw some of the guys outside, and I knew that I would be safe once I got into the parking lot. I hoped there was something I could do that would make Tony let me stay longer than I knew he wanted me to. I needed to know I was going to be safe for a long time, my sanity depended on it. I told myself it was something I would have to discuss with Tony, but for the time being I was going to be grateful he even allowed me on the property.

Chapter Four

Phoebe

I parked behind the clubhouse and Tony let me in through the back door. I couldn’t understand why he wanted things to be so secretive when the others were going to see I was there. Then I realized he might be doing it for my protection in case my father had people watching for me. After everything that had happened in my life, I wouldn’t put anything past that piece of shit. Tony showed me to a spare room that no one was occupying, and I sat my things on the floor in the corner.

I started to unzip my suitcase so that I could put my clothes in the closet and the dresser that was across from the bed. I could feel Tony’s eyes on me, boring into me as if he was trying to see deep into my soul or something. I was about to turn around and say something when his voice sounded from the doorway.

“This isn’t a permanent thing, Phoebe. It can’t be for many reasons, but I will help you figure something out,” he said softly.

I nodded in understanding and looked at the floor. I knew what the reasons were behind his decision, and I knew it was for the best, but at the same time I didn’t know what else I was going to do.

“Thanks for your help, Tony. It really means a lot even after everything.” My voice began to shake with emotion.

“You’re welcome. Just don’t make me regret it okay?” He grinned before he left me to get settled in.

I hung some of my clothes in the closet and put some of my under clothes and pajamas in the dresser across from the bed. I kept most of my things packed up so I didn’t have much to pack when the time came to leave. The thought of leaving the club again made me sad and for a moment, I wished I hadn’t done the things I did to make Tony leave me. But then again, he was an ass to me too so it wouldn’t have worked out anyway. I guessed that things had worked the way they were supposed to, and I had to admit it was good to see him happy even if it did chap my ass that he was never that happy with me.

I finished putting my things away and headed out into the main area of the club and grinned at the shocked faces of the guys. Tony stood and waved me over, so I made my way to him and wrapped my arm around his waist. I grinned at the murderous glare that Kara shot my way and I dared her to challenge me with a look in my eyes.

He looked at me with a look that told me not to push my luck as he unwound my arm from his waist and the grin that Kara shot me made my blood boil inside me. For a moment I thought about dotting her eye, but thought better of it, considering I had nowhere else to go that would keep me safe and protected the way I was being protected here. I told myself to take a deep breath and keep myself under control. The last thing I needed was to lose my safe place before I was able to enjoy it.

“Everyone, Phoebe is gonna stay with us for a bit until she can get back on her feet and be safe from her father. We’re all going to help keep her safe while she is here, and I don’t want anyone doing or saying anything bad to or about her. I hope I’ve made myself clear.” He moved away from me and reclaimed his seat next to his bride.

My stomach rolled at the way he carefully caressed her swelling belly and looked lovingly into her eyes. I didn’t understand why he couldn’t have been that way with me, other than that I had come to him as damaged goods and was too fucked-up to see that he loved me. It had to have been that because the beginning was good, and as time went on things got worse and worse. I knew it was my fault that he pushed me away. I just wanted to be angry at him, because I knew there was nothing that I could do to change what happened.

It was too late to change anything, he had a new woman, one he’d made his bride. She was the queen of his kingdom and that made me entirely too jealous for my own good. I watched as they laughed and talked amongst each other both paying attention to her growing middle, and I wondered what that felt like. I knew that was something that I’d probably never get to experience myself and that made me sad and even more jealous of his bitch. She was getting everything I’d ever wanted, and I hated her for it.

I wanted to smack his bitch across the face just for the fact that he treats her better than he ever did me. I knew that wouldn’t help me have a safe place to stay, so I controlled the urge within me. I glared at her as she stared daggers at me, and I had to tell myself to keep my hands to myself for my own good. I knew that one day I’d get my chance to fuck her up the way I wanted to, but that could only happen once I was on my feet and taking care of myself. I told myself I had to make this work as I made my way to the bar for an early afternoon drink. I knew it had to be five o’clock somewhere, and I was going to try my best to drink my pain away even though I’d done it multiple times and knew it really didn’t work.

It was still going to be fun trying to forget how shitty my fucked-up life had been and how fucked-up I was. I told myself I was probably going to be alone forever except for the clients that I serviced, but I still wanted a different life for myself even if I probably wouldn’t get it. I’d spent the last eighteen years doing what was necessary to stay alive and hidden from my monster of a father—I was sick of it. I was ready for a new life without fear and having to hide all the damn time. I just didn’t know when that was going to happen for me. I wouldn’t be totally safe until the bastard was dead, and by the sound of the texts he’d sent me death wasn’t too far off.

I wasn’t sure if he was telling the truth or lying about being sick, so I wasn’t sure if I could trust that I’d be free soon. Maybe I did need to go see him and get proof, but being near him was a risk that I wasn’t sure I wanted to take. I told myself that for now I’d steer clear of him and try to make my life better no matter how hard it was. I shake the thoughts from my mind and think about the drinks that I am about to have and the fun that will hopefully follow them.

It had been a while since I’d drank anything. I knew I was safe enough here that I could let loose a little, so I felt no fear as I entered the bar. I took a look around and it looked to be the same as it was the last time I was here. It brought back memories and I had to smile at them as I stood in the doorway looking around.

As I made my way to the bar, I realized that I was not going to be able to become a member of the club for my protection by getting with any of the higher-ranking members. They all knew who I was and what had went down with me and Tony. None of them would ever dream of touching me for fear of what Tony might do to them. I knew I was going to have to win over one of the younger, newly patched fellas or at least someone that hadn’t been there long enough to hear any of the horror stories I was sure Tony talked about me.

I rounded the corner and stopped dead in my tracks when I saw him. A tall, thin but muscular drink of water making his way to the bar. I stood around the corner and watched him as he walked, noticing he had the most gorgeous ass that filled his tight jeans. His abs made their presence known through his tight shirt and I resisted the urge to go and touch them. His biceps rippled as he reached for his drink, and I knew then that if I didn’t look away, I was going to have a mess to clean up. He looked young, and I wasn’t sure if I should even go after him. I knew that he couldn’t have been in the club too long so he might not have heard too many stories about me, and I might have a chance with him.

I waited for several minutes before making my way to the bar. He was sitting at the edge of the bar sipping a drink when something was said that made him laugh. The sound of his laugh made my body tingle and my nipples hardened instantly. My panties grew moist, and I gasped at the feelings it caused between my legs. I knew then that this man was the one I needed to go after to be my protector.

There was something more there between us, I felt it. He hadn’t noticed me yet so I was sure he hadn’t felt a damn thing, but he would. I just hoped my plan would work. He seemed so young and innocent I almost felt bad for targeting him for my mission. I wondered if he would even be interested in me. I considered just going back to my room and not saying anything, but I knew my survival depended on it.

I gathered my courage and talked myself into approaching him as I walked through the doorway that led into the bar. Our eyes met and it felt like a thousand tiny bolts of electricity making their way throughout my entire body. I wondered what he was thinking as he looked me up and down, and I thought I saw him adjust himself as he sat on the barstool. I smiled to myself at that thought and sauntered over to the edge of the bar. I leaned over the edge of the bar making sure my tits were hanging out so he could get a good look at them. My heart was beating out of my chest, and I prayed that God would answer one prayer for me and let him want me. I took a deep breath as I prepared for what was to come. I hoped he would be the next and good chapter in my fucked-up life.

I ordered a drink, making sure to keep my cleavage as the main attraction and watched as he sipped his drink. I knew what I was trying to do was a long shot, but I needed to keep a spot in the club for the foreseeable future and he was my ticket. I sipped my drink and watched him from the corner of my eye as I tried to play it cool and act like I was indifferent to him being beside me. His presence was making my body hum with desire and that hadn’t happened in a very long time. I hadn’t even gotten that reaction when I was with Tony. I knew this man had to be something special if he was causing me to react like that. I just hoped he would give me the time of day. I knew I was going to have to persuade him to and that was something I was very good at. I’d been taught the art of persuasion early on in my teen years and knew just what to do. I just hoped it worked on him.

Chapter Five

Cameron

I was sitting on a bar stool at the edge of the bar laughing and joking with the bartender when she walked through the door. The attraction was instant, and my cock pushed against my jeans. Despite that I knew I couldn’t touch her, because of her history with Tony and the club. I’d heard Tony’s announcement and knew he was being nicer than he wanted to be to her, but I thought it was a good thing that he was doing for her.

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