Page 16 of Heart's Keeper

Xilya tapped her fingers along the console. "Yes, he just left. Slivi never spoke of it. Though we could see she was distraught. It was a strange, rare occurrence. I know little of medicine, but I could tell enough it was some kind of sickness of the mind."

Lana covered her face with her hand, then let it fall. "We had a name for something like this on Earth. But it was something that was common mostly in old folk. Years of research and advancements in medicine drove the disease away. But it couldn't be the same thing. And even if it were, there must be surgeons on Tryth who have medicine that could help."

"That I don't know. As I said, it was a very rare condition. Something that I've only witnessed once ever, and the times I've heard of it happening again are very few." Xilya gave her a regretful sort of look. "I'm sorry to have told you this. I didn't mean to cause you distress."

"I'll watch over Xerus closely, " Lana said. "If he gets worse, we will bring him back to Tryth and have him looked over."

"That would be wise. Also, understand that Vresna was up in age and likely was deteriorating. He no longer had the strength to endure and so he gave up. It could have been much worse for him in that regard, if we are even talking of the same illness. They might have similar reactions, but just know I have also seen warriors act up in similar ways when highly stressed. It could be a reaction to something."

"He would have told me if something was bothering him," Lana stated.

"Of course. But sometimes it is hard to say what is causing the problem. Even those affected may not know or understand why their bodies or subconscious reacts as it does."

Lana nodded. Yes, the same could be said for humans. It was very possible that vrisha reacted to overwhelming conflict in a similar way. Xerus had been through a lot over the years. He'd spent countless years fighting off a parasite...and destroying whole species that had been infected in order to save others. He'd seen death many times. He'd put his body through major trauma more than once for the sake of his mission. Who knew what kind of damage had been done to his mind and body in the process.

"I am grateful for your insight," Lana said, then rose from her seat. “I think I’m going to see how Xerus is doing.”

“I am happy to help,” Xilya replied. “I’m sorry I couldn’t give better information. But perhaps…" Xilya turned back to the console. "There certainly could be more information in the vrisha indexes. I will search more for an answer.”

"I would very much appreciate it." Lana started for the door. "If you find anything, let me know right away."

"Just one more question before you go."

Lana turned. "Yes?"

"Just curious, did he ever display uncontrollable emotions in the past? Where he could not be calmed?"

Lana thought it over. She was about to tell her “no” when a memory resurfaced. One from a time in Lazris.

"When he was held prisoner by my kind. He had these moments where he would lose himself in rage."

Xilya nodded. "A reaction to a highly stressful situation. Not uncommon in the warrior class. Have him meditate, soothe his mind any way you can. When this is all said and done, I would consider making this your last mission."

Lana's eyes widened. She nodded her head as if she could agree. But in truth, she didn't know if she could convince Xerus to stop missions altogether. She would have to worry about it after.

***

Back in their room, Lana found Xerus sleeping. He slept more than usual, she noticed, and, though it worried her some, she did not attempt to wake him in fear of another mood swing. Instead, she sat down on the edge of their small inner bed and watched him for a long time before undressing and joining him, placing herself against his backside, one hand resting carefully on his ribcage. He did not stir at her touch; the only movement came from the slight rise and fall of his chest. He barely made a sound save the soft hiss of breath. Lana patted his side gently and just lay there next to him, letting her mind race, letting memories and "what ifs" clash and collide like angry waves in her head.

Eventually, she must have fallen asleep because she found herself in her father's house again, the radio playing static, the smell of tobacco wafting in the air. She stood alone in the living room while outside a terrible storm raged. She watched through the window as the deck flooded and the windows cracked from flying debris. The house shook, and the roof rattled as if being ripped open, but all Lana could do was stand there and watch. She woke in the dark sometime after, heart racing, stomach in knots, but she didn't leave Xerus' side even to walk around the ship to ease her mind. She thought about the story Xilya had told her and knew, if Xerus got worse, she couldn't just keep waiting and watching. She would have to make a decision that could harm years of trust between them.

Chapter Seven

Though she fell in and out of dreams, Lana eventually found some small measure of sleep before the lights brightened in the room and woke her. Blinking several times, she turned her head and reached out, only to find the other side of the bed empty.

Sitting up, she looked around and her stomach twisted once more in fear. Rising out of the bed, she dressed quickly in her kelva pants and top and exited the room. The passageways of the ship were empty, but she could hear the voices of several close by. As she entered the central chamber, she found Xerus there, talking with Gyrix and Krel. Heart leaping in her chest, she started for them only to see Krel and Gyrix bow their heads to Xerus, with Krel dipping lower than necessary. They each were calm, with no waving tails or defense postures. They talked quietly until they saw her, and Krel and Gyrix grew silent.

"Risa," they said as Lana approached. She acknowledged them enough not to be considered rude, then looked to Xerus. He looked normal. In fact, he looked much better than before. His eyes were clear and focused, his gaze direct as usual. He peered down at her with a curious and somewhat amused gaze, and Lana nearly let out a sigh of relief as his mouth widened back in a smile made just for her.

"Risa," Xerus bowed his head. "Did you sleep well?"

Lana opened her mouth and was about to say 'no' but instead said, "Well enough. Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." He tilted his head. "Are you? You seem...startled."

Lana looked at Krel and Gyrix. "Do you mind if my predomis and I talk in private?"

"Of course, Risa," Krel said. They each slipped off, leaving her and Xerus alone. Lana looked back at Xerus, studying him closely.

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