Page 77 of Heart’s Prisoner

"I will spare those who are clean and defenseless."

Lana closed her eyes, thankful. "You must stay clear of Galger and his team. I have...information that they plan to take out any on sight. I don't know how you would be able to do it, but maybe you can somehow...I don't know...shepard the healthy ones somewhere hidden and safe...somewhere they can hide." Lana dared meet his gaze. "I know you don't exactly love the human race. But will you do this?"

Xerus raised his chin slightly as he glared at her. "I will...try."

Lana couldn't help the smile growing on her face from relief. Her smile fell, however, when she felt something slither and wrap around her ankle. Jumping, she glanced down and saw Xerus' tail caressing her leg. She hadn't noticed he had moved it out of the water.

Tensing, she dared not move as she felt it rise along her backside, pressing against her robe. Her breath caught in her throat and her heart hit harder in her chest. Not wanting him to see her reaction, she continued to clean him, trying to ignore his tail. She concentrated on his chest then his stomach, his shoulders then arms, trying to be done with it as quickly as possible. Trying not to think about how hard and powerful he felt under her hands. Xerus watched her again and she wondered what he saw. And what he was thinking. When she was finished with most of his upper body, she hesitated at his lower, her mouth going dry. Just as she touched at a section below his hip she found she couldn't go any further.

Lana opened her mouth to tell him that she was done when he reached out his hand toward her. As his fingers grazed against her neck, Lana went still as a rabbit in front of a hungry wolf. She dropped the cloth in the tub, her hands going to her sides.

"What was that thing you did when you saw my dead body?" he said slowly so that she understood each word. His hand wrapped tenderly around her throat, lifting her head so she would look at him. Lana stared wide-eyed. Though she understood the words she didn't get his meaning. "What thing?" she asked softly. Xerus tilted his head and his eyes flicked down to her mouth and Lana thought then she understood. He was talking about when she had kissed him after seeing his supposed corpse. As a way of goodbye. How he could have sensed or known it was her was unimaginable.

Lana's heart raced. She licked her lips, uncertain how to respond. "That was...I thought you were dead and..." Lana shook her head, heat building in her face. "It was a kiss," she said in a nearly inaudible whisper.

Of course Xerus heard her. "What does it mean?" tilting his head even more, eyes filled with a fiery curiosity. Lana let her lids fall, too embarrassed to meet his gaze.

"It's a form of..." oh, god, she didn't know how else to put it, "affection amongst humans."

"Affection?"

Lana felt like a child as she said, "I thought I'd never see you again. It was just my way of...saying goodbye."

Xerus didn't move for a long moment and neither did she. When his fingers slipped from her neck up to her jaw, brushing his thumb against her lips, Lana flinched away. Remembering her dream from many nights ago, her stomach did a violent flip and she backed away from the tub.

"I, um, I'm sorry if that had been rude," she said, stammering. "Anyways, I'm not feeling very well, I'm sorry you'll have to...finish without me." Before he could speak she pulled herself away from his tail and rushed out of the bathroom. She shut the door behind her then limped her way through to the other side of the large unit until she went into another spare bedroom far on the opposite end and shut the door soundly.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Lana didn't leave the bedroom for the rest of the day and into the night. A new, inexplicable fear began to seep its way into her mind and she was uncertain how to respond save to stay away from the alien beyond the door.

It was when she finally fell asleep that the nightmares warped into something new and the fear revealed itself within her dreams. Ever since Xerus' supposed death, she had been having a new set of so-called nightmares. She was in a dark, wild forest racing through the trees. There was lightning lighting up the night sky but no rain. Just flashes of white and blue against a smokey backdrop. Though she didn't see it, she knew something was hunting her. The dreams usually ended with her stopping at the center of a rocky meadow, beside a large, murky pool; when she looked back, she saw the shadow of something giant and monstrous right at the edge of the darkness.

This time the dream didn't end. The shadow slipped from the darkness and there she saw Xerus in his raw, feral splendor, slowly coming towards her like a tiger stalking its prey. Lana drew her hands up as if to ward him off only to see that her hands were not her own. They were alien to her; blue and sharp and scaled. A tail swayed beside her and when she looked back at the pool she did not see herself in the reflection but a reptilian creature with her face.

"Don't run," Xerus said. Lana looked back at him too frightened to speak, afraid she couldn't. He moved ever closer to her. "Don't run, Lana."

She stayed put like he asked though the fear still tugged at her, telling her to bolt. He came to stand beside her by the pool and they each looked down at it. He took her hand in his, intertwining their fingers.

"Vina sila. Kissala."

Lana's heart slammed in her chest but she stayed. His fingers slid to her throat, fingers pressing lightly. What happened after was a chaotic blur like the silent storm raging above them. She was on the ground, he was atop her. She hissed like a cat as his claws dug into her thighs. He moved violently against her but she didn't cry for him to stop. She felt primal and wild and alive.

When she woke up she found herself slick between her thighs and sweating. Quickly, she rushed to her bathroom and turned on the shower making sure the water was ice cold. She didn't know how long she stayed in there, maybe hours, but Xerus never once came to check on her. She wasn't sure if she was relieved by that or disappointed.

When she came back into the room and sat down on the bed she couldn't help thinking about the dream, analyzing its meaning. Of course, she could easily gather what it meant though she found it hard to admit to herself.

You're in love with him, aren't you?

Galger had said that to her and she thought nothing of it then, convincing herself that she only cared for Xerus, nothing more. But even she couldn't deny the intense emotions he was bringing out of her. More powerful than she had felt for any human man.

If she did admit it, the question she had to ask herself then was, was it right? It wasn't like interspecies coupling had ever been discussed in her academic years. It wasn't something anyone at the research base had ever considered. There were no rules or laws because society was still young in mingling with other species. Truly, if she was honest with herself, she cared little for what others thought. With the situation she was in, she had lost a lot of her faith in the human race regardless.

So the issue was with herself alone. Insecurities about how they could be together. Would he even want her? She, who was so different from him, soft and small to his large, rough physique. And he was already chosen to be with another. A literal queen of his race. How could she compete with that?

What scared her the most was what would happen afterward. She had to believe that somehow they would come out of all this in the end, hopefully unscathed. Would she lose him again after he completed his mission? And could she bear it?

Lana closed her eyes and breathed deep. She had to face him. She couldn't remain locked in this room forever. Eventually she had to tell him the truth.

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