Page 32 of Keep Me Safe

Vin Diesel pops onto the screen, and I know we’re watching the firstFast & Furiousmovie. Classic Noah and Jared. This series is one of their favorites. Over the years, it’s become one of mine too. I settle in next to Jared, leaning my head on his shoulder.

I can feel Noah’s eyes on me as I glance up, meeting his gaze. His face is tense, his brows knitted. Is he still mad at me? I don’t have the energy to deal with that right now. Ignoring him, I sigh and turn back to the movie, snuggling into Jared. He wraps an arm around me, his other hand holding his phone.

We stay like that for the rest of the movie. When the credits roll, I don’t want it to end. My anxiety almost completely disappears when I’m with them, and I need that right now.

“Wanna watch the second one?” I ask, hopeful.

“Oh, I can’t, I’m sorry! I have plans with Jake tonight.”

My face falls. I know they’re friends, and Jake’s stunt in the bathroom doesn’t change that, but it still doesn’t feel good. Noah’s eyes meet mine, and there’s recognition there.

“We can still watch it if you want,” he says softly.

I think about it. The last time we were alone, things happened when they shouldn’t have. But I don’t want to be alone right now, and he’s offering, so…

“Sure,” I reply.

After Jared leaves, Noah looks over at me.

“I’ll be right back,” he says.

I wait patiently, snuggling up with the blanket. I listen for sounds in the kitchen, and I distinctly hear the door of the microwave close. Oh, he better come back with popcorn.

Minutes later, he re-emerges from the kitchen with a popcorn bowl in one hand and a glass of white wine in the other.

“Legally, I do not know you have this,” he says as he hands it to me.

My heart melts a little as he sits down on the couch. He’s pressed against the armrest, as far as he can get from me. I let out a laugh, and he looks over at me.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.”

He scowls, grabs the remote, and puts on the second movie. The popcorn smells delicious, and I want some. The only problem is there’s an ocean between us, and he has a death grip on the bowl. I crawl over the cushions to sit by his side and feel his body tense.

“Relax, I just want some popcorn,” I explain, reaching my hand into the bowl. He softens a little, but not completely.

“Kira, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

My heart skips a beat as I look up at him. Is he still mad at me? Before he can say anything, I apologize.

“I’m sorry about the other night,” I blurt. “I promise I’ll let you know if I’m not coming home in the future.”

He shakes his head, “That’s not what I’m talking about.”

“What do you mean?”

“That night. In the kitchen. That should have never happened.” His voice is low but firm.

My heart sinks.

“Don’t worry, I understand. You don’t see me like that, and why would you? I don’t know what I was thinking. I’m sorry.”

“What?” he asks, sounding confused.

“I get it. I’m Jared’s friend to you. It’s fine, really,” I don’t know if I’m telling him that or myself.

He’s looking at me like I’m crazy, disbelief playing in his eyes. His jaw flexes, and he seems like he’s trying to find the right words. I don’t need this rejection right now, not on top of everything today.

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