Page 44 of Vendetta

Courtney had been invited, and I had to pat myself on the shoulder for my five-star ‘totally unaffected’ performance as she had used the shortage of seating to make her way onto Cashton’s lap for the entirety of the movie.

After my panic attack on the side of the road two weeks ago, he had gone back to ignoring me. Always so hot and cold that man, and face always so impassive that it would take a college degree in Cashton to figure out what was going on inside of that head.

I had decided that he wouldn’t get an ounce more of my energy, and had been actively working on completely erasing him from my mind. It was easier said than done though, especially when my traitorous body wouldn’t get on board. It didn’t take more than one look from those devastating green eyes to make my body come alive, something that I hoped would pass with time.

One thing was for certain, though, and that was the fact that I was totally and completely done trying to be any type of civil with the asshole. I would tolerate his presence for the group’s sake, but that was the most he would ever get from me from now on.

I wasn’t the type to get even, or really the confrontational type at all, but I was also done letting him walk all over me. Fighting fire with fire had never been my mantra, but clearly whatever I had been doing to attempt getting into his good graces had been severely failing. And so, if he came after me again, I would stand up for myself.

I had been a doormat for the majority of my life, letting people walk all over me left and right, but he had sparked a fire in me and then proceeded to fuel it every chance he got. And he would soon learn that there were only so many times you could poke a wild animal before it decided to fight back.

Not that I was a wild animal, by any means. I was typically calm-mannered, actually. More like a house pet. But he awoke something in me, and she was ready to push back.

Did it matter that he was the best sex that I had ever had in my life? That I constantly thought about him, and wondered about what he must have endured in life to make him so bitter? No, it did not. I was completely over Cashton Astor. Or at least, I would be soon. Maybe.

“How about spin the bottle, but with holly?” Zayn suggested, throwing a wink Olivia’s way.

“That’s…” she started, ready to chide him for the ridiculous idea, but coming up blank. “That’s actually not a horrible idea. It’s festive, after all!” she laughed.

“Spin the bottle it is!” Nate called from across the room, the rest of the party cheering in agreement.

Kaptan rolled his eyes, muttering something about us all being childish before getting up to grab another drink.

“Hey you ass, don’t hate on spin the bottle! Like Olivia said, it’s festive. Get in the Christmas spirit and come make out with some people under the holly,” Zayn yelled after his brother, looking almost offended.

“Well, we don’t actually have holly, but I’m sure we can find something that works,” Olivia laughed, making her way to the kitchen.

Some of Nate and TJ’s lacrosse buddies helped us move the coffee table to the side of the room, clearing the floor so we could all fit in a circle. Bexley and I exchanged questioning glances, something along the lines of ‘Are you actually down to do this?’ and ‘I guess so, you?’ and ‘I’m in if you’re in’ exchanged in the looks.

To be completely honest, I didn’t think Bexley had ever even kissed a guy. Not that I was calling her a prude, but she had openly admitted to me that not only was she a virgin, but she had never had a boyfriend, or even been on a date for that matter. Never even fooled around with a boy. But as long as she was comfortable, I wasn’t about to stop her. There was also still the overlying mystery of where she had spent the night on Halloween, so maybe things had changed after all.

“No holly, but would basil work?” Olivia asked as she walked back into the living room.

“Same thing!” TJ called, the group bursting out into laughter.

I was surprised the two were down to participate, but according to Olivia, it wasn’t uncommon for them to indulge in some fun with others every once in a while. ‘As long as we’re both there and both in agreement, and as long as it never crosses the line. Nothing below the pants, ever.’ she had said during one of our girl’s nights. I hadn’t judged, actually admiring the trust. Their relationship was solid, and they were each other’s best friends and greatest supporters. I knew that Olivia could get a bit wild, and I was just happy that she had found her match. Someone that kept her wild and free, never trying to dim her light, but accepting her for it and loving her all the more.

Olivia handed the basil to TJ, offering him a broad smile and a quick kiss as he made his way outside to find a ladder, then tying the bundle of herbs to the center of the chandelier. This entire thing was comical, but yet the grin on my face was plastered in place as I soaked in the joy around me.

“Okay, everybody get in a circle! Who has a bottle we can use?” Olivia ordered, her blown out ash brown hair bouncingover her shoulders as she made her way to grab the empty beer bottle from a male on one of the large sofas.

She ushered all of us onto the rug, the group forming a wide circle. About half of the people remained standing on the outskirts, not wanting to play but none the less excited to observe.

Bexley and I took up places next to each other, shoulders bumping as we glanced at the males in the circle. To my horror, Cashton took a place across the way, Courtney clinging to his side as she slid in next to him.

I ripped my eyes away, leaning my head on Bexley’s shoulder as she placed a hand on my outstretched leg in comfort. She hadn’t said much regarding the situation, being more of the quiet listening type, but she was fully aware of everything that had passed between him and me. The small act filled me with a small sense of comfort knowing that I wasn’t alone.

“Who’s first? First round is girls’ spin only. Guys, just sit back and wait!” Olivia asked, her voice carrying over all of the conversations taking place around the room.

“I’ll go!” announced one of the girls to my left as she crawled to the center of the circle and spun. The bottle pointed across the way, to a beautiful dark-haired guy wearing a tacky Christmas sweater similar to mine and Bexley’s matching ‘naughty’ and ‘nice’ ones. The group cheered as she made his way to him, a blush creeping across his dark cheeks as she leaned forward and offered him a sweet kiss. I lifted my drink in celebration, cheering alongside everybody else.

The game continued, some offering hesitant pecks while others dove in for the full thing. Olivia had offered a quick peck to a few of the guys around the group, TJ at ease by her side ashe sipped from his beer. Nate had landed on a tall blonde girl near us, offering us quite a show as he stuck his tongue down her more-than-willing throat.

I hadn’t failed to notice all of the hopeful glances in Cashton’s direction, each of them making me sick to my stomach. And after the first few kisses tainted his lips, I got up to excuse myself for another glass of eggnog. I was an idiot to imagine that anything could have been different with us, the proof right in my face as he let the girls devour him, one after the other.

My jaw became so painfully tight that I knew it would be sore in the morning. Fuck him. I loathed that he was able to make me feel this way. Insignificant and un-special.

I took my turn next, making my way to the center of the circle and grabbing the clear bottle between my fingers as I spun it hard. My heart thudded as it slowed, trying to predict where it might land. And as it came to a halt, I refused to look up, knowing exactly who sat in the direction it was pointed. Because of fucking course, it had landed directly between Cashton and Courtney. Why wouldn’t it have? The universe loved to fuck with me, after all.

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