Page 92 of Sypher

“I know that, Danny,” Dante absently said, his eyes skimming the material Dr. Jefferson gave him. “All I’m saying is that there might be more we can do for her.”

“No. For right now, we will do what Dr. Jefferson advised,” I firmly said, then sighed when I saw Dante’s face. Reaching over, I took his hand in mine and kissed the back of his hand. “I know your heart is in the right place, babe, but you need to look at this from our little girl’s perspective. Her world has been turned upside down. She’s scared and unsure of everything. We need to give her all the love we can, because no matter how much we try to protect her, the real world is still out there banging on the damn door, demanding entrance. I can only hold them off for so long.”

“How long do you think we have before they realize we’re out?”

“I’m figuring a week, two at the most.”

Dante gasped. “That’s not nearly enough time!”

“That’s why before shit kicks off, I need to know that you and Danika will be okay.”

“What are you talking about?”

I shook my head. “It’s nothing, babe. I’m just overthinking everything as usual. Let’s get our girl home. I’m starving.”

For the next few days, my little girl’s needs superseded all other concerns and priorities in my life, demanding my complete attention and care. It felt good to let everything fade into the background and simply be present with her, her presence a calming balm. I thought I knew love, but the feelings I had for Danika were unlike anything I’d ever experienced; they defied description.

She was so small, so beautiful, so fucking perfect.

The mere sight of her was enough to bring tears to my eyes, a testament to the depth of my emotion.

To be honest, the prospect of fatherhood was something I never envisioned for myself. Considering the life that I had lived, that simply wasn’t possible. In my heart, I longed for it, dreamed of a future where it might be attainable, but I actively suppressed any burgeoning hope that it could ever truly be mine.

As the rain quietly fell outside, I stood at the window of our modest two-bedroom apartment, gazing down upon the city lights, and in that pensive moment, after a long period of time, I finally let myself think about my dad. An ache pulsed in my chest, a constant reminder of how much I missed him. I knew, with a certainty that settled deep in my bones, that he would know exactly what needed to be done. The urge to call him andhear his voice one last time was overwhelming. I longed to have a conversation with him about everything and nothing at all.

He would have the answers.

He always did. For the longest time, I thought he was invincible, the strongest man I ever knew. He always had the perfect answer, a flawlessly articulated response, to every question I posed. Though he wasn’t a man of many words, when he spoke, his words were heartfelt and deeply personal, expressing everything he felt. Even as I grew older and didn’t want to listen anymore, he was still there, right down the hall, waiting for me.

Then one day he wasn’t.

My world was never the same after that day. A cold darkness wrapped around my heart as I tried to process a life without him. I hated myself, him, everyone involved, all because I didn’t know how to handle the emotions raging deep within me. For the longest time, I held onto those feelings, using them as a cloak to protect me from ever feeling that pain again. Then I saw Danika, and that cloak evaporated as the truth hit me like a freight train.

My dad never wanted to change me. He just wanted to be a part of my life. Everything he did, everything he sacrificed, was to give me a good life. He loved me the only way he could, and because of that, I thought he hated me.

But he never did. My dad loved me.

Loved all of me, even the parts he didn’t understand.

He always did.

Standing there as the truth seeped into my soul, I let my tears stream down my face, knowing I would never get the chance to tell him how sorry I was, when I heard something move behind me. Turning, a slow smile appeared on my face as she hesitantly walked over to me. Saying nothing, I bent down and picked her up and felt my heart shatter as I heard her sigh when she laid her head down on my shoulder.

Together, we stood there with her in my arms as we watched the rain fall. Closing my eyes, I tried to stem the tears as I wrapped my arms around her tighter.

“Let me tell you about the greatest man I ever knew.”

I don’t know how long I stood there and voiced those precious memories, but I left nothing out, because I never wanted this moment to end.

Sitting in the small diner across the street from where I left Dante and Danika, I waited patiently for them to arrive.

The choice was out of my hands now.

The only way to protect Dante and Danika was to ensure that they couldn’t be touched. Ever. And to do that, I needed their help. I just prayed that when I told them the truth, they were willing to help me. It wasn’t like I had much of a choice. It was the only way.

If they refused to help me, then I wouldn’t have a choice. I would disappear with them and erase our identities as if we never existed.

War be damned.

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