Page 45 of Diva Pop

“Fuck,” Silas growled out before dissolving into gasping breaths, his eyes still closed and mouth slack.

Silas gazed down at him, then stole a slow, sweet kiss. As he leaned back, he reached between them to grab the condom as he pulled out. Jett winced as he tried to lower his legs off Silas’ shoulders.

“Hold on, baby boy. Papa’s got you.”

After helping him get settled, Silas smiled down at him, his palm resting on Jett’s chest.

“Relax for a minute, sweetheart. I’m going to run a hot bath for you, then I’ll help you clean up.”

Jett made a pouty face. “But I want you to hold me.”

Silas appeared as surprised as Jett felt. At this point, though, he needed to face the facts. His old behaviors and beliefs about men and what it meant to have a relationship had been shattered by Silas. If he couldn’t have it all, couldn’t lay himself bare with his Papa, then he was only hurting himself.

“I’d love to hold you, baby boy.”

Silas sat up in the bed next to him, holding out his arms. Jett scooted up too, but then he froze. He stared at Silas, unable to make himself move closer. Okay. Maybe he wasn’t as ready for this much vulnerability after all. Frustration built beneath his skin. He wanted this. Wanted to be cradled in Silas’ arms, to feel what it was like for someone to hold him as if he mattered, as though he was precious.

“I’m being weird.”

Silas lowered his arms, but his expression remained soft. “You know that’s not true.”

“Is so.” He was back to feeling pouty. “What other person out there would say no to being cuddled by you?” Jett covered his face with his hands. “Even the word cuddle freaks me out.”

“You cuddle your unicorn pillow all the time. What’s different about that?”

Jett dropped his hands into his lap. Hmm. “Good question. I have no idea.”

“So, it’s not the act of cuddling that frightens you, but maybe whether your hugs will be reciprocated?” The corners of Silas’ mouth twitched, but Jett didn't think Silas was making fun of him. “I bet your unicorn never says no or pushes you away.”

Jett’s chest tightened and his stomach flipped. He swallowed past a lump in his throat. “I think I’m broken.”

Maybe trying to open up to Silas was a bad idea. It was starting to make him feel shitty about himself. When he was bitchy and full of himself, it was like being Queen of the Universe. That was a much better feeling than an almost has-been thirty-year old dancer with a bum knee.

“You’re not broken, sweetheart. You haven’t been treated how you deserve to be. Let me give you all my affection, but we’ll take it slow.” Silas reached past Jett, picked up his unicorn pillow then handed it to him. “Here. Put him on your lap then wrap your arms around him.”

Jett considered Silas then his pillow then Silas again. “I’m not used to anyone watching me clutching this thing like it was real. I don’t want you to think I’m a freak of nature or anything.”

Silas grabbed the pillow from Jett’s hands then hugged it to his body. “Doesn’t bother me.” Silas petted Stanley’s head. Jett had never told a single human being that he’d named his unicorn. “He’s soft. Does he have a name?”

Dammit.

“If he does, will that add to my freak of nature profile?”

“Do you need a spanking?”

Jett grinned. “I don’t know. Do I?”

“Probably. But you're not going to distract me from holding you. Not unless you use your safeword.”

Jett groaned, his brain hurting from all the conflicting emotions charging through him.

“I guess I’m the one who brought up being held, so no. I don't need to use my safeword.” He gestured to the pillow. “Hand Stanley over.”

Silas smiled as he gave him the unicorn. “Why Stanley?”

Jett tugged him to his frame, clutching him in a strong embrace as if the pillow would save him from some mysterious danger.

“It was the only name I could think of that didn’t belong to anyone I knew and was unlikely to belong to anyone I might develop a crush on in the future.” Jett squeezed Stanley tighter. “I needed a drama-free pillow.”

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