Page 15 of For the Love of a Boy

He followed Daddy into the building where they located the office directory by the bank of elevators. As Daddy looked it over, Seth took in his surroundings. Nothing remarkable stood out—the building was typical of what might be expected for a structure filled with medical practices. Still, Seth had expected something grander for the city of Portland. Overall, the area didn’t seem much different than Eugene—except more crowded.

“Ah, here she is. Third floor.” Daddy pressed the elevator button.

Seth furrowed his brow. He’d been so excited to be going to Portland. However, so far it was kind of a let-down. “Aren’t there any tall buildings in Portland? And didn’t you say there were a lot of bridges and a huge river?”

Daddy tilted his head. “Quite a few, yes. It’s a very interesting, eclectic city. Some of the buildings are quite old, yet others are very modern and unique.” He chuckled. “If it wasn’t for the traffic and unending press of humanity, it would be a great place to live.”

The elevator doors swished open and they stepped inside.

“This building is pretty plain.”

Daddy pressed the button for the third floor then regarded him. “Oh, I see what you’re saying. We’re not actually in Portland right now. This is Hillsboro, a suburb. There’s quite a bit of urban sprawl surrounding the city.”

“Oh.” Seth added checking a Google map to his mental list of activities for the next time he was on the computer.

They reached their destination and as they exited the elevator, Daddy placed his hand at the small of Seth’s back. “We can plan a weekend trip to Portland sometime if you’d like. It truly is a remarkable city. I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me that you might enjoy seeing it.”

“That’s okay. I never mentioned anything.” He glanced sideways at Daddy. “Didn’t you say that club where you met Everett is in Portland?”

Seth already knew the answer was yes, but he hadn’t been able to find a way to bring up the subject of the club before. Now here was his opportunity at an inopportune moment.

They reached the door to Dr. Clay’s suite. Daddy narrowed his eyes as he regarded Seth, his hand resting on the doorknob. “Yes, I did. Let’s revisit this topic after your session, though.”

Once they entered the office, Seth realized he’d been hasty in writing off the building as plain or boring. Maybe the outside part, but Seth found Dr. Clay’s suite to be interesting and beautiful. While Daddy checked them in with the receptionist, who was behind a glass partition at the far end of the waiting area, Seth looked around.

Two walls were painted a muted, deep purple with another one a pleasant forest green. The only wall done in the same drab cream shade the rest of the building boasted was the reception wall. Hanging on the colorful walls were several prints. The primary subject matter was landscapes with a fantasy theme such as sparkling waterfalls, majestic mountains or mystical forests. A bubbling, stone water fountain stood on a glass table in one corner, and a variety of plants filled the room—including a tall one that reminded him of a palm tree. That one was on the ground in the corner opposite the fountain.

Daddy had already taken a seat on one of the two available sofas, but Seth couldn’t stop inspecting everything. He didn’t touch. Even if he’d been compelled to, the lingering conditioning to keep his hands to himself was so ingrained that it had effectively killed the desire. He snorted. It was a miracle he’d ever been able to get an erection with Daddy. And that he not only could, but always wanted to. That in itself had to mean something.

Seth had never told Daddy, but he was convinced they were meant to be.

“Seth Johnson?”

He turned his head in the direction of the voice. A petite woman stood in the threshold to the inner office, smiling and holding the door open. Seth wasn’t sure, but he thought she might be around Daddy’s age. She wore a turquoise and green tie-dyed tunic over black leggings with short, slouchy black boots. The flowing shirt complemented her deep brown skin perfectly, along with her tightly coiled, copper-colored curls that danced past her shoulders. Her beauty intimidated him.

“Hi. I mean, yeah. I’m Seth.”

He cleared his throat then looked to Daddy for direction, who had already risen to his feet. Daddy made his way to Seth’s side, and he almost let out a loud sigh of relief.

She regarded Daddy then turned to Seth. “Is this your Daddy, Malcolm?”

Seth almost choked on his own spit, unable to respond as Daddy extended his hand to shake Dr. Clay’s.

“Yes, I’m the one you spoke with on the phone.”

Her smile brightened as she accepted his offer. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She returned her attention to Seth. “I prefer meeting with my clients alone for most sessions. However, Malcolm explained your situation and that part of your agreement to come to therapy included having him with you. Is that correct?”

“Uh…” He couldn’t keep his hands still. How could she be so casual about everything? He wasn’t sure he could hold it together. Daddy had told him she understood their dynamic, but not that they’d be talking about it.

He grabbed Daddy’s hand, clutching his fingers so hard, he was afraid he’d hurt him. However, the instinct to do so had been immediate and urgent.

“This is about your comfort, Seth. If you need to change the parameters of any session, please don’t hesitate to let me know.” She studied him and he felt exposed under her gaze. “Let’s all sit down together in my office and continue our conversation there. I have a questionnaire for you to fill out to start. It’s to give me an idea of where you’re at right now and to let me know the most immediate issues you’d like to work on. That will give you a chance to get used to being around a stranger in strange surroundings.” She smiled again. “Does that work?”

“Yes. Thank you. I don’t mean to be so…” Seth wasn’t sure what it was he was being. He didn’t think Daddy would appreciate it if he called himself weird. “Sorry. I freeze up sometimes.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, his mind jumped to Daddy’s reward system. He hoped he hadn’t lost out on a blow job because of them. His face heated.

She nodded, her features filled with compassion. “That’s a very common response for people who’ve been through what you have, Seth. The process that drives that reaction is something we can address in today’s session, if you’d like.”

“Okay.” He took in a deep breath. “That sounds like a good idea.”

“Then we have an excellent starting point.”

She gestured for them to go through the door, past the threshold that Seth hoped would lead to a type of sanctuary, a place where he could shed a portion of the agony that still clung to him like a disease. Seth caught Dr. Clay’s eyes and something in her expression eased his mind.

He smiled back at her and took the plunge.

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