Page 57 of In the Name of the Father

“If you don’t want anyone to see me naked, Daddy, I should probably get dressed before they get here.”

Malcolm also loved the mischievous glint that would now sometimes surface in Seth’s eyes.

He gave Seth a harder smack. “Brat.”

While Seth pulled on a pair of black khakis and carefully tucked himself in before zipping them up, Malcolm watched him in his peripheral vision. He buttoned his purple satin shirt and pondered how easily Seth had agreed to daily spankings. Malcolm couldn’t wait to get started in the morning. How he’d managed to be so lucky to have Seth in his life went beyond him.

Malcolm finished dressing then turned to check on Seth’s progress. He was struck how nicely the auburn button-down accentuated Seth’s green eyes. “Wow. Look at you.Sohot. Thank God Nate is straight as an arrow, or I’d be too jealous to let him in the front door.”

Seth still blushed now and again, but it had more to do with his difficulty accepting compliments than his shyness or sexual innocence.

“Thank you, Daddy.”

Seth shoved his hands into his pockets and Malcolm tried not to frown. The habit was one of a few that Seth only did when he was overly nervous. They’d met up with Nate once at the Arboretum for a hike, so Malcolm had hoped that having him and Tina over for a casual dinner wouldn’t be too stressful for him.

“Talk to me, baby. How can I help you?”

Seth chewed his lip and the hands stayed firmly encased in the pockets. Malcolm approached him. He stroked Seth’s arm, right above his wrists.

“Tell Daddy what you need.”

“I…” Seth’s brow wrinkled then he gazed up at him. “You. I need you.”

Malcolm gave him a reassuring smile. “You have me, baby. What else?”

Seth’s shoulders dropped. “I want your friends to accept me, to think as well of me as they do you.” Seth winced. “That sounded bad. I know that’s not possible, that I’m not the same as you guys. You’re all so…” He shrugged. “Interesting and worldly.”

Malcolm pinched the bridge of his nose.This is last minute jitters. It’s our first time having guests over. He brushed Seth’s cheek with his knuckles.

“We’ve had this conversation before, sweetheart. I realize that discussing something doesn’t magically fix how you perceive it, but let me reiterate—I’ve known Nate since he was your age. He was couch-surfing and borrowing from one person to pay off another he’d borrowed from until one day, everyone got wise to his shenanigans. Then he pulled himself together and figured out what he wanted to be when he grew up.”

Seth was still chewing on his lip, but he at least seemed to be considering what Malcolm had said. “And that’s when he decided to go to law school?”

“Yup. He had to work all day and study all night, but he pushed through and it changed his life. He might never have gone to the law conference where he met Tina.” Malcolm brushed back some loose strands of hair from Seth’s forehead. “And I told you my story, too. I was a cocky, young business student with no real plan other than to get laid when I met Everett. But my whole world changed after that. Give yourself a chance, baby. You’re at the very beginning with your whole life stretched out before you.” Malcolm pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Don’t try and rush things. Enjoy everything as it unfolds.”

Seth nodded then slowly removed his hands from his pockets. “You’re right, I know you are. I hate that I’m always second-guessing and doubting myself.”

Malcolm wrapped his fingers around Seth’s nape. “Time, baby. I know you’re frustrated. But I’ll be here for you, all right?”

Seth regarded him with the same questioning expression he’d sometimes seen from him lately. “All right, Daddy.” He averted his gaze. “I hope so.”

Malcolm’s stomach tightened in a knot. Seth turned away and made himself busy by sliding his belt through the loops and buckling it up. Malcolm ran a hand across the top of his head and sucked in a breath to reassure Seth some more when the doorbell rang.

I wonder if Nate would be pissed if I cancelled?

Malcolm rubbed Seth’s back. “Would you like to come to the door with me?”

He’d been so distracted by his beautiful boy, he hadn’t thought to ask what Seth would prefer. Tina would be new to him, and Malcolm wasn’t sure how Seth would feel about joining the group in the living room on his own.

Seth still kept his face hidden from him while he fussed with his belt. “No, that’s fine. I’ll be out in a bit.”

The words ‘I love you’ were right there, begging to be spoken, but Malcolm clamped his lips shut then left the room. They’d expressed to each other they were falling in love, that they didn’t want anyone else. But on some unconscious level, Malcolm wondered if he hadn’t yet gotten around to promising Seth forever so he wouldn’t feel trapped. That Seth would once again feel as if someone was making him do something he didn’t want.

Malcolm put a hand to his forehead as he approached the front door.Bullshit. They’d gone over their roles over and over. Sethwantedwhat they were doing. Malcolm paused with his hand on the knob.But I keep saying it’s up to him. Keep suggesting that it’s okay if he decides he wants to leave, that I won’t stop him if he does.

Malcolm let his head fall back with a groaning sigh.

Fuck.

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