Malcolm deserved better.
* * * *
“It’s been two hours, Nate. I don’t know what to do.”
Malcolmhatednot knowing what to do. It made him crazy.
“Where are you right now?”
The concern in Nate’s voice put him even more on edge. For the sarcastic guy who rarely took things seriously to sound worried, it meant Malcolm wasn’t overreacting.
“I’m sitting in my truck outside the coffee shop. Once it had gone past him being an hour late, and he wasn’t picking up his cell, I went from somewhat concerned to frantic. This is so unlike him. If he’d had to stay later at work, he would’ve called me once he’d gotten the chance.”
“Did you try the restaurant?”
Malcolm willed himself to calm down enough so he could speak without his voice shaking. “Yes. They said he left early, but the guy who I spoke with sounded off somehow, like there was something he was leaving out.”
“Hmm. Have you been waiting at the coffee shop the whole time?”
“No. I drove to the check cashing place he always uses, since he was getting paid today. That was something he was very excited about since he’s insisting that he wants to pay me for staying at the house, which is ridiculous, but anyway…” Malcolm clutched his hair in his fist. He felt as if he was coming unglued. “Uh, anyway, he wasn’t there, or anywhere nearby. I drove around a while longer to see if I could spot him wandering around for some reason, but then I panicked. What if he’d gone to the coffee shop and I wasn’t there? What if he thought I’d abandoned him even though I promised I never would?”
“Well…”
Malcolm waited for Nate to continue, but he didn’t. His nerves couldn’t handle waiting for a damn thing at the moment.
“Well, what?”
He cringed at how demanding he sounded but figured he could make it up to his friend later. This was aboutSeth.
“Don’t get upset, but did you consider that maybe he was waiting to get paid so he could take off?”
Nate might as well have punched him in the stomach. “N-no.”Why would Seth do that? “That doesn’t make any sense. Everything’s been going well.” Malcolm recalled the day Seth had broken down when he’d confessed what had been done to him, how scared he’d been when going to see Pastor Callum, the times he’d woken up at night screaming and Malcolm had run in to comfort him. “I mean, it’s an adjustment, sure…”
Malcolm frowned. No. Seth wouldn’t simply up and leave without saying anything. There had also been lots of laughter and smiles, walks together, going to the beach or the movies—hell, even hanging around the house together had been great.
Something else was wrong.
Nate spoke up again. “Right, that’s what I mean. I’m not saying that things have been bad between you guys, just that itisan adjustment for someone who’s been through the type of trauma he has. It’s cool that you took him to see that pastor, but if you ever get the chance, I’m thinking a therapist who specializes in PTSD might be the ticket.”
“My God. You’re right.”
Malcolm put a hand to his forehead. He’d been so focused on dealing with the religious aspects of Seth’s ordeal, an equally important avenue to healing had been overlooked. Malcolm considered everything else Nate had said.
“Thank you, Nate. I think I know what I need to do.”
“Good luck, I hope you find him. And Malcolm, do me a favor. If you do find him? Tell the guy how you really feel about him.”
“What? What do you mean?”
Nate let out an aggravated sigh. “Don’t pull that clueless act on me. You’re like a sub who’s been caught with their hand in their pants.”
“I…”This is a nightmare. “How could you tell?”
“I’ve known youwaytoo long, that’s how.”
“That’s too much pressure to put on him right now, it wouldn’t be right. If what you say is true, maybe that’s part of the reason he bolted. Maybe he can tell I want him too and he got scared, maybe being under the same roof with a man who’s attracted to him is more than he can handle right now.”
“Maybe. Maybe not. Did you ever consider that he might’ve taken off because he has feelings foryou, but doesn’t think they’re being returned? That the possibility of rejection after all he’s been through is more than he can bear?”