Page 64 of Gambler's Fallacy

Relief floods me, and I tell Caleb, “It can wait. Havoc’s coming.” And Havoc will stop Caleb from complaining about me missingone dayof work.

“All right.” Caleb pets Miss K, and her purring gets louder. He leans down to kiss the top of her head, and she gets up to rub against his chin with a soft meow.

The noise attracts Nacho’s attention. He jumps down from his perch on the cat tree. I stretch out my arm to him, but instead of coming to me, Nacho hops onto the armchair and butts his head against Caleb’s hand.

Traitor.

I huff out a breath and get up. I don’t want to be near Caleb, so I cross the room and head toward my bedroom. “Let me know when Havoc gets here,” I tell him.

It’s not like Caleb hasn’t honed in on the fact that I’m a bundle of nerves, but that doesn’t mean I have to show him as much.

It isn’t until I hear Havoc’s voice — several long, excruciating minutes later— that I come back out, wary but more confident about how this is going to go.

Havoc, at least, will understand.

I walk over to him, hugging him tight. “Get me out of here,” I complain.

Havoc squeezes back and glares in Caleb’s direction. “What’s going on? Why are you terrorizing Seven?”

Caleb picks up Miss K and stands up, walking over to us. She’sstill purring loudly. “I’m not terrorizing Seven. I want to discuss what happened the other day, when he missed work, had a panic attack, and needed Vortex to help him calm down.”

I don’t like the matter-of-fact tone he uses, and my arms tighten around Havoc as I wait for him to tell Caleb that it’s not something that needs to be discussed — that it was a mistake. “I already told you it won’t happen again,” I mutter.

Havoc leans away from me, though. “Wait, you missed work? Why?”

Before I can answer, Caleb holds his hand up.

“This discussion is happening, Seven. But you can choose which room we have it in.” He pauses, and more softly, he adds, “I will probably make you cry.”

Making me cry bodes well, at least. It means he’ll hurt me.

“Your room,” I say instantly. “Then you can be close to everything.”

We’ll talk about thisbullshit, then he’ll take up a flogger or something until I cry.

Thirty strokes, enough to show that he forgives me.

Caleb shakes his head. “I’m going to make you cry with words, Seven. You’re going to be afraid, and angry.”

“Wait, what the fuck?” Havoc puts himself between me and Caleb. “Why are you being such a dick?”

I want to know the same thing. Linda had already laid into me, and I don’t think I deserve more of the same — least of all from Caleb, who says he cares about me.

Unless he’s only pretending.

Caleb lets out a heavy sigh. “Because if I’m not ‘a dick,’ Seven will suppress everything, and then he’ll do something stupid like try to choke himself on Vortex’s cock.”

My head snaps up, and I look around Havoc at Caleb as utter betrayal runs through me. “What did he tell you?” I demand, anger and embarrassment making my cheeks feel hot.

“I thought you liked seeing Seven choking,” Havoc adds, quieter. “Seven likes it rough.”

“I really don’t want to have this conversation standing around in the entryway. Which room, Seven?” Caleb repeats.

“Why does it even matter?” I retort. “And I’m not going tocry. I’mfine.” But I let out an exasperated sound. “The living room is fine.”

“All right.” Caleb bends down to scoop up Nacho, who has been rubbing against his leg. “I’ll put the cats in your bedroom for now, so they don’t bother us. You can go sit on the couch. Havoc, sit with him.”

My heart is racing. I press closer to Havoc like that’s going to protect me from this talk that Caleb is being so serious about.

---