Page 131 of Gambler's Fallacy

Never.

Havoc wraps his arms around my waist. “We’re afraid thatyou’regoing to get hurt, Seven. It goes both ways.”

Caleb nods, but his grip on my hair stays tight. “You’re allowed to be scared, pet. But you aren’t allowed to give up. You were brave today. This is my order, as your master—you have to be braveeveryday. If you’re scared, you can turn to us, but giving up isn’t allowed, not even if you think it would ‘save’ us.”

“I feel like this is all I talk about,” I tell him hoarsely. “Whether they’re going to find me,” orwhenthey’re going to find me, “and what I’ll do the next time, and how long can I live like this, Caleb?Master?” I add, trying to remind myself that he’s there, that he’s stable, that he’s mine and I belong to him. “I’m so tired of it.”

Havoc tightens his hold on me. “You also liked swimming, right?”

“You’ve been a great backstage assistant,” Vortex adds.

“You are becoming quite the anime nerd,” Caleb says. “You now know more about modern anime than I do.”

“I want to see myself the way you see me,” I whisper. So badly, I want to be more than what my own thoughts tell me I am.

More than whatshetold me I am.

“We’ll help you,” Havoc says, nuzzling the back of my neck. “You aren’t alone.”

I nod, but I’m not sure I believe him.

“You aren’t,” Vortex says more firmly. “Even when we’re not physically there, Seven, we’re still close. Someone is always nearby, or we’re a text away.”

But I’m a burden, I want to say.

Instead, I nod again.

“Tomorrow, when we’re all well-rested and home safe, we’re going to tie you down and fuck you until you forget all about them,” Caleb promises. “Understood?”

I shiver, the idea of it so very good. I start to nod, then whisper instead, “Understood, Master.”

It might be selfish to want to be the center of their universe for a little while, even if it’s only temporary, but it doesn’t stop me from wanting it anyway.

Caleb bends down to give me a searing kiss, one that still tastes of pizza. I laugh about that, and I feel Caleb smile against my lips.

“Glad to have amused you, pet,” he says.

“Me too,” I tell him.

Havoc tugs me away from Caleb and nuzzles against my chin. “No hogging Seven, Caleb.”

“Why do the beds have to be so fucking small?” Vortex complains. “What are we doing, rock-paper-scissoring to find out who gets to sleep with him instead of one of you ugly assholes?”

Caleb goes back to his pizza. “I’ll share with you, Vortex. I hope you consider me slightly less ugly than Havoc.”

Havoc huffs in amusement, his breath ghosting against my neck. “I’m the hottest out of all of us. Except Seven, I mean.”

I roll my eyes, but I smile, too. I turn more so I can better wrap my arms around Havoc. “Hold me tight,” I plead softly, my smile disappearing.

Havoc nods and tightens his hold. “Always.”

We finish our pizzas with more subdued bantering, my eyes starting to feel heavy. It isn’t until Havoc moves me that I realize I’ve started to fall asleep, and he shakes his head when I try to protest.

I’m that tired, though, and as he curls up around me, I finally let myself relax and fall into a dreamless sleep.

I’m safe.

THIRTY

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