Page 17 of Defensive Zone

Rubbing over the center of my chest, I dig my fingers in to try and relieve the ache in my chest. I should be heartbroken overthe fact that my girlfriend dumped me—the woman I thought could be the one—but the ache is stemming from someone different.

It’s coming purely from the man who’s currently drinking beers in Chicago with his teammates.

The man who has been my favorite person since I was six years old.

And if I wasn’t already confused by Raegan’s words earlier, I’m definitely confused now.

Chapter Six

November

Carter

This day can’t get any worse.

Keeping my gaze lowered, I head back to the visiting locker room, shoulders slumped in defeat. I don’t know what happened out there. It was like my hands were covered in butter. Every tackle I made was a fail, and I couldn’t have sacked the quarterback if my life depended on it. I botched every play. Tripped over thin air.

I played like a fucking embarrassment.

Throwing myself into the seat in front of my designated stall, I toss my gloves against the wood paneling a little harder than necessary and let out a heavy sigh.

Fuck. This game was shit.

For the last seven years, I’ve always been voted within the top 5 defensive ends in the NFL. There were some guys who didn’t like coming up against me because I didn’t hold back. Off thefield, I’m laid-back and happy-go-lucky as they come, but when I’m out there, when I get into position, it’s like my vision turns red. I have one target in my sights, and I’m a hungry bear until I get it.

This season, however? I couldn’t have stopped the opposing team if they had stood dead still and slapped me in the face.

Like I said, I’m an embarrassment, and there’s only one thing that will make this day any better.

Zach Reid.

Stretching as far as my pads will allow, I retrieve my phone from my bag and swipe my finger across the screen to unlock it. I wonder where he’ll take me today. It’s been four months since I’ve seen him, and I’ve been counting down the days. We don’t get to see each other much during the season, especially because the NFL and NHL seasons overlap until January, but we always meet up whenever we’re in each other’s city, and Zach always takes me to grab some food before I catch my flight back to Denver. Last time, we hit up this incredible pizza place that was worth breaking my strict in-season diet.

But the rush of dopamine I typically get when I see his name on my phone doesn’t come. No matter how long I stare at the text message on the screen, it doesn’t change. There’s noJust kidding!follow-up text.

Zach

I’m sorry, I can’t make it today. Maybe next time?

An unpleasant ache that has become all too familiar recently blooms in my chest. There won’t be a next time. I’m only playing in Chicago once this season—the next time we face them will beat home—and when Zach is in Denver, I’ll be away in Pittsburgh. This was the only chance we were going to get to see each other until January at the earliest, because I doubt we’re going to get a spot in the wild card round, and he’ll be on a road trip during my bye week.

We made a pact, goddamnit.

Nine years ago, when we were lying on his bed in college on New Year’s Eve, we promised we would always see each other whenever we were in the same place. We might have been nothing but two punk-ass twenty-year-olds with big dreams of making it to the pros, but we weren’t naïve enough to think the odds would be on our side and we would land on teams in the same city. Being apart for the first time since we met was tough; throw in the fact that we were now states apart, not even in the same time zone, and it’s been hell. But we always got through it by sticking to the pact.

Until now, and this is the second time he’s broken it. I forgave him in the summer when he went back to Chicago six weeks earlier than planned. But now…

My fingers are flying over the screen, typing out a reply before I can think it through. A mix of desperation and frustration bubbles away inside me, causing me to not think clearly.

Carter

What? Why? What’s so important you can’t see me for 20 minutes before I have to leave for my flight?

Zach

I’m seeing the trainer about my shoulder before the game tonight. I’m sorry.

Jaw clenching, I let out a frustrated groan. Now I feel like a dick because I know his shoulder has been bothering him since last season, but still, heknewI was coming. He knew this was the only game I have in Chicago all season. I sent him my schedule the second it came through. Hell, I sent it to him before I even had a chance to read through it myself.

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