Page 38 of Off Season

“Yeah.”

“So he knew what he was signing up for. He can’t put all the blame on your shoulders because he could’ve gotten more involved. People invited him, and he didn’t go—how is that your fault? Hell, I’ve been welcomed into the fold because of Alex. I had my concerns, but everyone is great. It feels like a family.”

There’s a beat of silence before I let out a sigh and carry on.

“I'm sorry he couldn’t see what an incredible person you are, Ethan.” I place my palm against his cheek, gently turning his face toward me. “I’m sorry he didn’t value your love, but please don’t believe you’re in the wrong here for chasing your dream. Someone who really loved you would be by your side while you did.”

Dark eyes stare into mine. Neither of us moves or says a word. Blood rushes through my ears, muffling out any sound. His gaze drops to my mouth, and like instinct, my tongue darts out and runs across my top lip.

Butterflies swarm my stomach as Ethan’s eyes meet mine again, silently asking permission. Nothing could stop me from nodding. A meteor could hit, and I’d still want to feel him again.

He leans in and presses his lips to mine. It’s softer thanthe kiss we shared in his bedroom earlier. The gentle sweep of his tongue sends tingles down to my toes.

My hand runs down his neck to his chest, my fingers toying with the fabric of his suspenders. When I saw him wearing them earlier, I nearly dropped to my knees and begged him to do wicked things to me while keeping them on.

His warm hand cups the back of my neck, and I whimper into his mouth as his fingers gently tug on my hair and I lose myself in the exploratory glides of his tongue.

The next thing I know, he’s pulling me onto his lap, and I’m straddling him. My moan echoes around the quiet pond as he trails his lips down the column of my throat.

“Shh,” he murmurs against my skin, his tongue flicking over my Adam’s apple.

Ethan’s hands grab the globes of my ass and kneads. I roll my hips instinctively, seeking some form of friction as my cock swells impossibly hard. When our mouths meet again, it’s desperate.

Needy.

Frantic.

This kiss isn’t pretend. It isn’t for show. It’s giving in to the mountain of want that’s been bubbling beneath the surface for so long—the one we can’t fight any longer.

I want this man more than I’ve wanted anything in my life. And knowing that this may be all I’ll ever have of him makes me want to bury all my doubts.

To take a risk and jump.

“I want you,” I confess.

“I want you, too,” he mumbles against my mouth. His hands halt my grinding hips. “But if we do this, you need toknow that I can’t offer you anything more than the off-season.” He leans his head back, raising his hand and running his thumb over my lips. “And we need to set some rules, like not telling anyone back home. They’ll only interfere.”

I frown. “Why is our friends knowing a bad thing?”

“Because if we tell people we’re hooking up, they’ll jump to conclusions. They’ll be expecting more, and I can’t offer you more, J.”

I want more, but I don’t push. I can compartmentalize my feelings and take what I can have.

Temporary bliss.

Maybe once I’ve had my taste of him, the crush will diminish.

Liar.

Okay, well, I can try.

“When we get back to Chicago, I’ve gotta focus on my career. I don’t know how long I’ve got left. I have one season left on my contract, then I’m an unrestricted free agent. I don’t know whether the Thunder will want to sign a thirty-nine-year-old. I need to start thinking about who I am outside of hockey.”

I want to tell him that he doesn’t give himself enough credit. Of course the Thunder will be jumping at the chance to sign him again. I might be oblivious about the sport, but even I can see he’s a valuable asset to the team.

But I swallow down my opinion.

This isn’t the time or the place, and determination is written across his face. There’s no changing his mind.

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