Page 51 of Off Season

My eyes sting. “I love you too, and you haven’t made me feel that way at all. It’s all in my head.”

“I think we’ve been so focused on trying to stay strong for each other that we’ve ended up hurting ourselves in the process.”

Shit. He’s right.

Between the spiraling debt and trying to run a business, we’ve been in survival mode. I’ve suppressed my feelings to keep going, but disregarding them is not healthy. It’s just been building up inside, like a boiling pot threatening to spill over.

Weirdly, sharing my vulnerable side with Ethan helped. I feel lighter in some ways simply for acknowledging that I struggle sometimes.

I guess we’re similar in some ways. He doesn’t like to show emotion because of his previous trauma, and I don’t like to share my grief because I don’t want my brother to see me as anything but strong.

When he’s actually a lot stronger than I give him credit for.

“J?” Ethan calls out from the kitchen. “Jacob?”

I look up from where I’ve been curled up on the couch, completely engrossed in the book I started this morning. I don’t know what time it is or how long I’ve been reading for, but when Ethan appears in the doorway, there’s a playful grin on his lips.

“It’s raining.”

Stretching, I glance over my shoulder to the window. The rain is coming down so heavily I can barely see the rosebush outside the window. I’ve beenso lost in my fictional world that I didn’t notice it turn cloudy and gloomy.

I turn back to Ethan, puzzled. “But it’s summer?”

He shrugs. “It’s England, J. It rains ninety percent of the time, regardless of what time of year it is. Come.” He holds his hand out.

Placing my book down, I slowly stand up. Slipping my hand in his, I ask, “What are we doing?”

“You mentioned the other day that you like to do things that bring you joy, and one of the things you mentioned was dancing in the rain.” He grins, leading me through the kitchen to the patio doors. He picks up the remote to his sound system, presses a button, and Fleetwood Mac’s “Rumours” begins to filter through the speakers. “So, we’re going to do just that.”

My stomach flips. He remembered that? Wow. This man. Ian was a fucking idiot for thinking this man was hard to love.

And how did he know this was my favorite album?

Ethan is nothing but perfect to me.

I slip my feet into my shoes and follow him outside.

“Ohmigod!” I shriek, my hands instinctively coming up to shield my eyes.

The rain is coming down in sheets, and I’m soaked within seconds, but the temperature is still surprisingly warm.

Ethan wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me close. My arms wind around his neck, and our bodies sway to the music coming through the doors, mixed with the sound of the raindrops hitting the patio and thunder crackling in the distance. I grin up at him as he smiles down at me. Thosecute-as-fuck dimples pop on his cheek. The dark hair peeking out from beneath his backward baseball cap sticks to his face.

He’s so devastatingly handsome, it hurts.

I press my lips to his in a tender kiss before closing my eyes and tilting my head up to the sky.

I feel so carefree. I don’t give a shit that every inch of me is soaking wet. It’s like the rain is washing away all the burdens that have been weighing me down, cleansing me and my soul.

Ethan takes my hand, and with the other on the base of my spine, he leads me around the patio in a waltz. He hums along to “Dreams”, spinning and dipping me in an extravagant way. I’m so freaking happy at this moment that my cheeks are aching from smiling.

When he pulls me back to his chest, he dips his head and captures my lips with his. I lose myself in the warmth of his mouth.

In the soft but guided strokes of his tongue against mine.

My hands snake up around his neck, finding purpose as I lean into his solid body.

His kisses captivate me. Own me in ways I’ve only ever read about in books. I didn’t think it was possible for someone to make my toes curl in my shoes with a single kiss, but he does.

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