Page 34 of Lavender and Honey

“Because of what happened earlier?” I asked, eyes glancing away from the man who moved to stand in front of the checkout counter.

“Yes.The kiss.”He sighed, running a hand through his hair, “Do you want to close the store so we can talk without any interruptions?”

I took a deep breath and nodded, standing and going to the door before locking it and flipping the closed sign around. I then pulled the blinds down so there was more privacy. I was a bit nervous to be alone with this unknown Alpha, but at the same time I was so out of it I just wanted to get this conversation over with before going home and sleeping.

I turned back to face Soren, my heart pounding in my chest. He was leaning casually against the counter, his purple eyeswatching me intently. There was something soothing about his presence, despite my nervousness.

"Thank you for agreeing to talk," Soren said, his voice gentle. "I know this must be overwhelming for you."

I nodded, not trusting my voice. Soren's scent— Sandalwood with a hint of cinnamon— calming some of my anxiety.

"Let's sit," he suggested gently, gesturing to the small seating area I had set up near the front window for customers to browse the art books. I nodded, moving to take a seat in one of the plush armchairs. Soren settled into the chair across from me, his tall frame somehow managing to look relaxed despite the tension in the air.

"I want to apologize for Elias's actions," Soren began, his voice soft but firm. "He can be... impulsive at times, especially when he's excited about something. But that's no excuse for making you uncomfortable."

"I wasn't..." I started, then paused, unsure how to express the tangle of emotions inside me. "I was just surprised and confused."

Soren's purple eyes softened, “What are you confused about? I know he has been courting you…” He didn’t even get to finish that before I looked at him with wide eyes.

“…did you not know?” Soren asked, blinking in confusion, “Elias has made it very obvious he was trying to court you and we agreed to do the same once we heard about you.”

I felt my heart skip a beat at Soren's words. Courting? The realization hit me like a wave, suddenly putting all of Elias's actions— the gentle touches, the thoughtful gestures, the way his scent spiked when he was around me— into a new perspective.

"Courting me?" I repeated, my voice barely above a whisper. "I... I didn't realize..."

Soren's purple eyes widened slightly in surprise. "Oh, Lydia," he said softly, his voice filled with understanding. "I'm so sorry.We thought... Well, we thought you knew. Elias has been quite open about his intentions, at least from our perspective."

He paused probably seeing the lost look on my face, “That and when Finn and Lucian met you they fully came on board and knew once I met you we all would be trying to court you as well.”

I felt my heart racing, a mix of emotions swirling inside me. Part of me was thrilled at the idea that these kind, attractive men were interested in me. But another part, the part that had been hurt before, was terrified.

"I thought... "I paused to look at Soren in a new light with this information, “I thought they were being friendly and that is it…I hadn’t even thought someone would court me…”

Soren was quiet for a minute, looking at me with purple eyes lit with such interest that I wondered what he was looking for. He gave a sigh as he leaned forward, his gaze gentle but intense, “Lydia, can I ask you something?”

I nodded slowly, a frown on my face as his gaze stayed just intense as he continued, “How do you feel about Elias? About the thought of us?”

I felt my cheeks warm at the direct question. How did I feel? The truth was, I wasn't entirely sure. Elias made me feel safe, comfortable in a way I hadn't felt in years. And the others— I had only met Lucian once…and Finn a couple more than that. Even with that, they made me feel safe and cherished with how they spoke– not to mention their actions around me.

I took a deep breath, trying to organize my swirling thoughts. "Elias… he makes me feel safe," I admitted softly, my eyes fixed on my hands in my lap. "Comfortable, in a way I haven't felt in a long time. And the others— Finn and Lucian— even though I've only known them for a short time, they make me feel… cherished, I suppose. The way they speak to me, the way they act around me..."

I trailed off, unsure how to put my complex emotions into words. Soren waited patiently, his purple eyes gentle and understanding, "And you... I don't know you yet, but you seem..." I trailed off, unsure how to describe the calming effect his presence had on me.

Soren nodded encouragingly, his purple eyes warm. "It's okay to be unsure, Lydia. Feelings can be complicated, especially when you've been hurt before."

I blinked in surprise at his perceptiveness. "How did you...?"

He gave me a gentle smile. "I'm observant. And the way you react to certain things... it speaks of abuse.”

I flinched at those words, “I wasn’t…”

He shook his head, “Emotional abuse is still abuse…” I shut my mouth at this. My parents never raised a hand at me, but I had been yelled at and belittled my whole life… and told that I was only good to have children and make alliances with a more powerful pack.

I felt tears prick my eyes at Soren's words. No one had ever put it so bluntly before, had ever acknowledged the pain I'd carried for so long. I blinked rapidly, trying to hold back the tears.

"I..." I started, then paused, unsure how to continue. Soren waited patiently, his gaze filled with gentle understanding and sympathy.

"You're right," I finally admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. "My parents... they never hit me, but they made it clear that I was a disappointment. That my only value was in making a good match, having children..." I held back the whimper that I wanted to escape my lips.

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