Page 123 of Never Kiss and Tell

Irritability courses through my veins and my good mood fades. Of course, I’m nervous. Why wouldn’t I be? Charlie and I are basically wearing a big neon sign that saysWE’VE BEEN HAVING SEX EVEN THOUGH WE HATED EACH OTHERin front of everyone we know. Madonna would be nervous.

“Areyouworried?” I ask, turning the question back on him.

He eyes me and I look straight ahead as the city begins to swarm in around us. The tall buildings make my chest hurt, my throat tightening until it’s harder to breathe. I don’t know if it’s my reaction to the city or what I told Savannah, but my heartbeat is thumping in my ears, my skin feels too small, and my mouth has filled with saliva. Just the thought of letting everyone else into our private affair has me debating on rollingout the truck door, traffic or not. If I survived, I could make a run for it. If I didn’t, then I still wouldn’t have to go.

“Why are you upset?” Charlie asks, his tone clipped.

“I’m not upset.”

“Don’t lie, Bailey,” he warns, turning to look at me.

I don’t respond, shaking my head and looking out the window beside me. I tightly grip the small bag where I had stashed my phone and lipstick, hoping he couldn’t see the slight tremor in my hand.

Abruptly, the truck jerks to the right and comes to a halt at the curb. The people behind us honk at us and the driver flips his middle finger, but Charlie doesn’t seem to either care or notice as he sets the brake. My stomach clenches when he turns to face me, his shoulders tense and his gaze smoldering.

“We aren’t moving until you talk to me.”

Biting the inside of my lip, I will the anxiety that I’ve turned into fear to calm itself, but it’s not working.

“What do you want from me, Charlie?” I blurt, finally.

“I want you to tell me what’s gotten you so upset. Was it something that was said? Did I do something?”

I shake my head. “You aren’t listening to me. What do you want from me? What is the point of this?”

“This what?”

“This!”I practically screech at him, gesturing between the two of us. “You and I. It was just supposed to be sex and now we’re spending every second together. We cook together, shower together. We even sleep together. We broke every single rule we set out.”

His eyes darken past the point of anger. Fear coils inside me,but I push it down, my anger winning.

“Do you want to go home?” he asks, his voice suddenly cold.

I lean back against the head rest.

I weigh my options. Going home gets us both out of this before either one of us gets hurt. Going to the rehearsal together sets us up for more let down in the long run. I know Charlie doesn’t want anything long-term. When this started, neither did I, but recently I’ve been second guessing myself. I developed feelings for him past just lust, even before I let him kiss me again.

My anger isn’t with Charlie, or going to the party together or even the fact that I know this is coming to an end, one way or another. It’s with myself. I had been the one that put those rules in place. Just sex. Nothing else and here I was, the one that was thinking of jumping off the deep end for a man who isn’t willing to give me the things I’m dreaming up in my head.

“Can you take me home, please?” I ask, finally, settling back into the seat. Tears burn at the corners of my eyes, but I use all of my willpower to keep them from spilling over. Charlie stares at me for a long moment and I can feel his gaze burn into the side of my face.

But he doesn’t say anything. He puts the truck in drive and cautiously pulls back onto the road and circles back toward home.

We sit in silence while I wage war in myself. I ruined everything because I’ve become too attached. Now, I’m making him take me home because I’m too afraid of what will happen when this is all over.

The other shoe has to drop at some point. I’m just forcefullyremoving it and throwing it across the room.

When I get home, I’ll either Uber to the hotel or tell Andi I’m sick, like a coward. No. Scratch that. Iama coward.

But Savannah’s voice pops into my head, telling me Charlie and I both seem like we need someone willing to work in a relationship together. I never thought something so small could play such an impact on my thoughts, but that sentence sticks with me, playing over and over like some kind of broken record.

Mom always told me to take chances and grow. If something bad happened, in the end, you would learn from it. Was I letting her down, by chickening out at the last second before going to this party?

Charlie pulls down a quiet street at the very start of the Quarter. Devoid of people.

The windows are completely tinted.

“Bailey—” Charlie starts, but I cut him off.

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