Page 44 of Escalating Alpha

“I never touched her,” Carter said when I stepped out into the hallway Monday morning.

“What?” I asked, not having been ready to deal with him or this topic—lost in my head as to my huge list for the day.

“It’s come to my attention that you don’t—you were too scared to ask. I had no idea you wondered or—I never touched her, Sera. It wasn’t sexual.”

“I can’t get—”

He grabbed my arm when I went to flee and forced me to face him, his expression destroyed. “I never even kissed her besides the cheek. The bond was like a buddy. I know what you saw and I would be pissed—crushed after my head has cleared. I’m horrible for having sided—it’s all confusing and I suck.” He let out a slow breath. “But I never touched her.”

I searched his eyes. “You fed from her.”

“Herwrist,” he clarified. “And I wasn’t going to, but then she said you wouldn’t want me thirsty and it just made sense. Like of course you wouldn’t and yeah, my friend wouldn’t lead me wrong. That’s what it was. It was like one of the team telling me something that I would trust. The bond forming made me skip steps.”

“That bitch needs to be put in the ground for manipulating you like this,” I grumbled, shock rocking me when I saw herdeath in his eyes. I let out a slow breath and thought back to my talk with Hagan. “I don’t have the mental load to handle the rest of this conversation right now.”

“I know,” he whispered, letting me go. “I just…” He swallowed loudly and scrubbed his hand over his head. “I couldn’t have you thinking for another day that I touched her or cheated like that.” He sighed when I frowned. “You were crying in your sleep last night. You kept saying ‘don’t go’ and you said my name.”

I opened my mouth but then closed it. I did it a few times but then sighed this time. “I don’t know if it was—I remember dreaming about Stacey and Clayton. Sometimes you and Axel have been in the nightmares and lead little Sera from that place. You guys helped me because you understand what I do.”

“That’s ridiculously cute,” Axel said from behind me as the door to my apartment opened. “I love the idea that I come into your dreams and rescue you from the past—reliving it.”

I gave a half shrug, embarrassed now. “Thanks for telling me. I’m glad you didn’t fuck her.”

“What can I do next to help you with this?” Carter asked as I turned to leave, not stopping me though.

That question might have seemed off the cuff to most, but it was something Phobie had already asked me, so I was ready. I thought it was too much to ask, but she was clear that when we were the ones wronged, it was fair to ask still.

It was up to the other person to decide if we were worth it to make things right after whatthey’ddone wrong. It wasn’t on us.

That was hard to digest at times. It always felt my fault and on me.

“Yeah, show it all to Eva and Jonik or Dain when he gets back. I want someone else to see what happened and determine the scope of it. You were basically under the influence, and I cannot be objective.”

I didn’t wait for his response, but halfway to work I realized that was really how I felt. Carter was basically under the influence when that bitch tried to use him, and that was what pissed me off so much.

“What can I do for you, Niece?” Joshua Andino greeted. He was Zeno’s younger brother and now the wolf councilman on the shifter council.

“How do I propose a law? A new one? Officially. I’ve only made it clear that laws were against US law and to change them before I got pissed. I want this official and legal. I would prefer the council do it, but I will go to Congress about this and make a mess.”

“This is about your Carter,” he surmised. “I can hear the rage in your voice. Tell me where your head is.”

So I did. I sighed when he didn’t say anything. “It’s no different than if he was drunk and someone signed his name to a marriage certificate. He was not in control of his faculties fully and someone took advantage of it.She knewwhat was going on. He didn’t. Fuck, there should be a law that we have to disclose it. It can be dangerous when it’s someone ancient.”

“Yes, which I would not ever mention again as that’s one of the list of reasons people want them terminated,” he said with a dark chuckle. “Vampires do better living to be ancient than shifters do. Mostly because they become harder to kill with age than we do. We hit a certain level and then it doesn’t grow much unless specific to our strain and female like you.”

“I think I knew that, but honestly it’s hard to remember it all. I appreciate you always reminding me without making me feel stupid or assuming I’m ignorant,” I told him.

He was quiet a moment. “Thank you. I’ve had people recently tell me that—it’s been pointed out that it’s a flaw. I think I needed to hear someone appreciated it.”

Iinstantlyknew what was going on. “Joshua, you’re dealing with insecure people who take offense and will lash out over anything. Haton said that place is like a constant cage match. They’re all way too wound up. I would suggest imposing vacations because they’re all burnt out like I’ve seen for undercover. You cannot take what they say about you personally at face value.”

He let out a slow breath. “She’s right that it is like that. I find myself having underestimated this place, and—wolves really are the biggest problems too often. It’s upsetting. The lastseveralwolf councilmen let too much go and bucked everything. I feel like when I try to clean up, I’m standing in quicksand. And I don’t know how to ask for help.”

“Without everyone feeling superior and this idea was a mistake,” I grumbled. “Yeah, I’m with you there.”

“Asking Mauro for aid was smart. It was a good move and he’s a bright one. He won’t lead you astray. I don’t know Eva’s younger sister, but—you are loved by that family and they won’t let you fail.”

“Thanks. We’re here for you too,” I said, backing off my anger. “Do you agree with me on this?”

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