Page 44 of Dark Horse

“She seemed to think so the last time she saw him. Hazel, who’s almost as protective as you when it comes to her, likes the two of them together. Says they’re a good fit. You got a reason to say they aren’t besides jealousy?”

“I’m not jealous,” I snap. “Never been jealous a day in my fucking life, and I sure as shit didn’t start today.”

“That’s not the way it looks to everyone else in that room. You’re not gonna have to worry aboutmetelling Hazel because her brothers can see it plain as fucking day.”

I take a swig of beer and lean on the railing. I’ve been stupid, letting things flare my temper like that. Worrying about every little fucking thing like some jealous fucking idiot. He’s right, and I fucking hate it when that happens.

“If you want her, why don’t you tell her that?”

“Because I shouldn’t fucking want her, Ramsey. She’s my best friend’s kid sister.”

“She’s not a kid anymore.”

“Doesn’t matter. I was her guardian. I swore I’d watch over her, and I’m pretty fucking sure he didn’t mean while I was buried inside her.”

“You’ve slept together?” Ramsey sounds surprised.

“No. I haven’t touched her.” It was technically true. I’ve imagined it. Promised to do it. Thought about it thousands of times at this point. But I haven’t followed through. Yet.

“How does she feel about you?”

“I don’t know. We don’t talk about feelings.”

“Maybe you should start. Whatever is going on between you two that doesn’t involve feelings or touching seems to have you all twisted up.”

“I can’t. It’s… too complicated.” My heart drops to my gut because I know what I should do. I just have to bring myself to do the right thing. “Is he really a good guy?” I take another draw of my beer to wipe the bad taste out of my mouth created by even asking that question.

“He is. Mostly has his shit together. As much as any of us do. Doesn’t fuck around a lot. Spends a lot of time with a charity in town. Has our backs on the field and off it.”

“You’d let him nearAspen?”

“Aspen would tear him to pieces, but I’d trust him with her. Yeah.”

It’s not the answer I want, but Ramsey wouldn’t lie to me.

“Fine… I’ll stay out of the way.”

“That’s not what I’m telling you to do. I’m just telling you not to rip the guy’s head off and to talk to her if you feel some kind of way about her being with someone else.”

“It’s none of my business who she’s with or what she does.”

A loud, rumbling laugh rips out of Ramsey’s chest, and he nearly spills his beer. It takes him a full minute to recover enough to stand straight and look at me.

“A full fucking quarter of your personality is worrying about what that girl does and when.”

“Because I’ve been trying to keep her safe.”

“Is that what you’ve been doing that’s got you like this?”

“I thought it was…” I shake my head. Now I’m wondering if it might be me she needs to be kept safe from.

We stand there for a long time in silence, staring out at the night sky while we both drink our beers. Until Ramsey finally breaks the silence.

“I’ve never seen you like this.”

I take the last sip of my beer and stare at the empty bottle.

“I’ve never felt like this.” It’s more honesty than I want to give. More than I’d give to Levi or Aspen on this particular subject. Levi would warn me off and tell me to keep my head in the game. Aspen would go buck fucking wild with the information that a woman caught my interest and be planning a future where I hang up my hat and fill my life with family photos and PTA meetings. But Ramsey knows what it’s like. He’s right in the thick of it now with a woman who isn’t all that different.

---