Page 39 of Two Minutes for Holding

I opened the door, pulling it closed behind me and locking it, then I took off down the driveway and made my way to the house two doors down from where Knox and Lorelai lived, and waited.

I slippedmy shoes off and then my jacket and hung it on the hook on the back of the door to Clay’s place.

“Take a seat in the living room. I’m going to grab us a couple of bottles of water, a little snack, and I’ll be right in,” he said, waiting until I turned and made my way into his dimly lit living room.

I sat down on the couch, in the same spot I’d sat that very first night that had started this entire thing. My mind drifted to the memory of us together, and I pulled my legs up under me, grabbing one of the side cushions, hugging it to me. This was my comfort position, one I’d always resorted to when I needed comfort.

I sat there, quietly, looking out at the city lights. There was something so peaceful about being way up high in this city, I thought to myself. If only being this high up could take me far away from the problem that I was currently facing.

“Here you are,” Clay said, coming into the living room with a plate of crackers and cheese, some apple slices, grapes, and two bottles of water.

“Thanks,” I said, taking the bottle of water from him, watching as he placed the plate down on the table in front of us, then sat down beside me.

I took a sip of water at the same time he took one and then placed the bottle on the table, looking over at him. I was expecting to see anger, but he seemed at peace, as if he wasn’t the least bit worried about anything. It always amazed me how some people could be that way.

“So, how long have you known?” he asked.

It was just like Clay to jump right to the point. I mean, he told me he didn’t dance around things; when he wanted to know something, he’d ask. He certainly didn’t lie about that.

“I found out once I returned from Vermont. So, I’ve only known for a couple of days. I haven’t even seen my doctor yet.”

Clay nodded and averted his eyes from mine. He leaned forward and grabbed an apple slice, popping it into his mouth.

“Can I ask you something?” he questioned.

I nodded.

“Am I the father?” he asked, raising his eyes to mine.

“I’m thinking the baby is yours, but until I know how far along I am, I am not sure I can really answer that.”

“I see,” he said, getting up off the couch, moving to the window, looking out over the city.

He shoved his hands in his pockets as he stood there, rocking back and forth on his feet. I’d never seen Clay this quiet, or this wrapped up in his thoughts. He had always seemed so sure of himself, like he always knew what it was he wanted.

“You’ve been with Tor since we were together?”

“No, not since we were together, but I was with Tor about five weeks before you, so until I know for sure how far along—”

“Fair enough,” he said, holding out his hand for me to stop. “Please don’t feel you need to explain anything else. It’s not like we were together or anything.”

I swallowed hard, unsure what he meant by that. I felt I needed to explain and make sure he knew I hadn’t been with anyone but him since the first time we’d been together.

“What did you want to do about this?” he questioned, not giving me a chance to ask him anything or to comment on his last comment.

I thought for a moment.

“I mean, if it is mine, what do you want to do about this? Obviously, if it isn’t mine, then I won’t have any say…”

“I don’t know. I mean, it’s all so fresh. I’ve barely even grasped the idea that I am pregnant, so trying to decide what should happen is almost surreal to me at this point.”

“You’re telling me,” He muttered.

“What does that mean?” I asked, feeling my emotions piling up.

Clay sat down beside me and ran his fingers through his hair. “I guess it means I’m shocked as well. This wasn’t exactly in my plans.”

“You think it was in mine?” I questioned, feeling tears building.

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