Page 82 of Fear of Intimacy

“Of course, I will.” I sniffled. “Can’t get married without me.” Josie laughed as she wiped her eyes. Pulling my hand from hers, I wiped my cheeks.

“Damn you, Josie Scott for making me cry.” Who would have thought a simple question would get me to burst out in tears? I wasn’t prepared. Neither was my mascara that was probably smudged under my eyes.

“At least you look like a cute panda,” Josie joked, cleaning her own from under her eyes.

“Of course I do, but seriously, I’d be honored to be your maid of honor.”

“Good, cause I’m going to need someone to help me veto Wyatt’s ideas.” We both shared a look. Men were pretty helpless when it came to planning a wedding.

“You’re going to hire a wedding planner, right?” There was no way Josie and I, even with help from the other girls, could plan an entire wedding in five months.

“Yeah, we’re meeting with someone on Tuesday.”

“Okay, one thing down, hundreds to go.” Even though there was a lot to do, I was beyond excited to help my best friend get married. I was going to do everything I could to make sure it was the best day of her life.

The two of us talked more about wedding stuff as our food came. Trying to come up with a game plan on where to start first, when to look for dresses, if they wanted an engagement party, and everything else. The entire time we talked, Josie had a permanent smile on her face.

I never saw her so happy. She was always stressed and worried about her father, going every weekend to see him to make sure he was taking his medicine and doing okay. Shegave up so many weekends to be with him. Always pushing aside her happiness.

Then, when she dated her asshole of an ex, I thought she finally found that happiness. I thought she was finally with someone who could make her smile and give her the world. Who would treat her like she hung the moon. But I was so wrong. He gave her none of that.

I will never forgive myself for not noticing the signs. For being so wrapped up in my own life that I didn’t notice my best friend, my sister, being hurt by that monster. I hadn’t known the extent it went until I saw the bruises until later on. I had been sick to my stomach when I found out what had happened behind closed doors. Even now, I could barely stomach the thought.

When I apologized for not being there for her, she told me there was nothing to apologize for. But if I hadn’t been so selfish and wrapped up in myself, I would have seen what was going on long before. I’ll never forgive myself for that. Even if I did get revenge on Josie’s behalf.

Josie will never know what I did to her ex for laying a hand on her. I plan to never tell her the strings I pulled using my parents’ last name in order to make sure the guy’s life was ruined. To this day, I’ll never regret what I did. Especially sitting here across from her and seeing her smile like that.

“So tell me, what’s been going on with you? Feels like we really haven’t talked much,” Josie said a moment later.

My stomach knotted in guilt. Since we’ve been back from our vacation, we’ve only talked once on the phone mixed with a few texts. I'd been busy with work and spending most of my time with Trevor. I hated that I was keeping stuff from her, but at least I could tell her one thing.

“I actually have something to tell you.”

Josie leaned in, gazing at me with an arched eyebrow.

“I got a call from my mom a few days ago.” Josie rolled her eyes. After everything, Josie was not a fan of my parents.

“What do they want now?”

“They want me to marry the son of some business partner.” Josie’s jaw dropped at my revelation, her expression one of disbelief.

I'd been doing my best to shove aside the whole thing since I last spoke with my mother. The fact that my own parents would arrange a marriage for me without even asking was like a stab in the back. I could take the jabs about my job or being forced to stupid events to show off but this… This I couldn’t do.

“You’re kidding me right?”

“Wish I was.”

Trevor did a great job at keeping my mind off of it, but I couldn’t help but still think about it.

“They want you to marry someone you’re not even in love with? For what?!” Josie exclaimed.

“So their companies can merge.” I grimaced. “Sounds like the plot to some bad romcom.”

“They do realize it’s the twenty-first century, right?”

The whole thing made me sick to my stomach. There was no way I was going to go through with it. I wasn’t a puppet that my parents could control.

“What did you say to them?”

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