Page 8 of The Last One to See Him

Sweat coats the backs of her knees by the time they’ve reached the canal. The boys are sitting on the grass, their roars of laughter drifting to the far side of the grassland. Robbie races over when he spots them, heading straight for Mona. Like a scene from an old movie, he wraps his arms around her and kisses her as if he hasn’t seen her for years.

‘Get a room,’ Kate jokes.

‘Yeah,’ says Kian, winking at her.

A frisson of excitement shoots through Kate’s body and she smiles and quickly turns away. She can’t bear to look at Kian; he’s painfully beautiful, too perfect, and it makes her ache for him.

‘Hey, Kate,’ Kian calls. ‘Come and sit with me.’ He pats the grass beside him and her stomach flips. She needs to get a grip – he’s just a boy; she can handle sitting next to him. She’s not going to fall for Kian Roberts.

She makes her way over to him, her leg brushing against his as she sits beside him.

‘Want one of these?’ Kian asks, offering her a can of Budweiser.

Kate scrunches her nose. ‘No, thanks. I don’t drink. Seen what it does to people – my uncle’s an alcoholic. It’s not pretty.’ She’s offering too much information but she doesn’t care. People need to know what that stuff can do.

Kian raises his eyebrows. ‘Sorry about that. But you do know that most people can have a drink and not turn into alcoholics, right?’

‘We’re fifteen!’ she protests. ‘Youdoknow it’s not actually legal to drink until we’re eighteen?’

‘Hmm. I don’t follow the rules,’ Kian says, smiling. ‘I feel like I have enough sense to know what’s good for me and my body.’

Kate’s unsure how to respond to that, and she’s beginning to think perhaps she doesn’t actually like Kian after all, and that sometimes people are better admired from a distance, but then the atmosphere shifts, as if suddenly Kian is stripping away layers of himself.

‘I’m being a dick,’ he admits, pulling his legs up to his chin. ‘Sorry. I was just trying to impress you.’ He gestures towards the canal, where Robbie and the others have picked Mona up, teasing that they’re about to throw her in. She erupts into shrieks, pleading with the boys to put her down. Kate’s pleased to see Mona enjoying herself after how withdrawn she’s been the last few months.

‘It’s hard, you know,’ Kian says.

‘What is?’

He sighs. ‘Living up to people’s expectations of me. I’m supposed to be this…I dunno…popular, funny, cool dude. And everyone’s watching me all the time. Like,allthe time. Following my every move…’ He reaches for his can and swigs his beer.

Kate stares at him, half expecting him to sayJust kidding, I love my life – it sure is great being the centre of attention.But the frown on his face shows her he means every word.

‘There’s a lot of pressure on me,’ he continues. ‘And sometimes I get sick of it.’ He lifts his can, which surely must be empty by now, and stares at it. ‘So, yeah, I don’t need to drink this, but I do it anyway, because that’s what everyone expects me to do.’

‘I don’t care about any of that stuff people expect you to be,’ Kate says. ‘You just have to be yourself – whoever that is. It’s not your job to keep other people happy. To be their leader. Is it?’

He tilts his head and appraises her, raising his eyebrows again. Kate expects him to laugh, to dismiss what she’s said, but instead he says, ‘Thank you, Kate Mason. That’s just what I needed to hear today.’

While the others continue messing around by the canal, she and Kian talk for the next hour, shutting out the rest of the group, the rest of the world. Kian gets through another two beers, while Kate slowly sips her third Coke.

With no warning, Kian leans in to kiss her, and despite how much she wants him to, her bladder feels heavy and uncomfortable. ‘I’ll be right back,’ she says, jumping up.

He looks disappointed.

‘I just need to find a toilet,’ she explains.

‘Can’t you go behind a tree or something?’

‘Not that easy for girls. I’m sure you know that.’ Kate places her hand on his shoulder to reassure him. In the last hour she’s learned that Kian isn’t as confident as everyone thinks. Just like everyone else, he has his own insecurities.

‘Hurry, then,’ Kian says. ‘I like talking to you, Kate.’

There are no toilets near the canal, so she ends up walking to the high street, practically running because she doesn’t know how much longer her bladder will hold out, and because she’s desperate to get back to Kian. He was about to kiss her and she wants that so badly.

She dashes into the customer toilets in Marks & Spencer.

As she’s washing her hands, someone taps her shoulder.

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