Page 18 of Flashpoint Feelings

No. I force away the thought, jaw clenching as I struggle to hold it together. This is exactly why I need to transfer. Because I can’t trust myself to make tactical decisions with her safety on the line. Can’t trust my judgment when my heart’s involved.

The irony isn’t lost on me that the very qualities that drew me to Maya, her fearlessness, her drive, her absolute refusal to back down from a challenge, are the same ones making it impossible for me to stay. Because watching the woman you’ve fallen for walk into a burning building is a special kind of torture, even when you know in the marrow of your bones she was born for this job.

I swallow hard, tasting the acrid smoke on my tongue, but nod. Chief’s right, I’m needed on ventilation, but it doesn’t make it any easier watching Maya check her radio.

The smoke pouring from the building’s windows is thick and black. A grease fire, for sure. The kind that can flash over in seconds.

We pile out, and once command has been established and the initial safety assessment is complete, Maya catches my eye one last time before pulling on her mask. Despite the circumstances, her confidence shows in every line of her body. She’s got this. I know she does. But my heart still lodges in my throat when she disappears into the smoke with Jake right behind her.

Chapter eleven

Maya

Ipeel away layers of gear, my shoulders protesting every movement. The acrid smell of burned grease hangs in the air, mingling with the scent of wet pavement. The midday sun bakes the scene, its warmth barely registering after the inferno of that basement and at least an hour of fighting the persistent flames.

I let my head fall back as I work my arms free. The coat’s familiar weight slides away, and cool air hits my sweat-soaked shirt, sending goosebumps racing up my arms. I sink onto the corrugated corner of the firetruck’s bumper. Every muscle in my body screams after hauling three terrified kitchen workers up those narrow stairs through choking smoke and then another grueling hour on the ladder platform, helping direct the master stream. But it’s a good exhaustion. The kind that comes from doing exactly what I’m meant to do. Satisfaction thrums through my veins. Everyone made it out alive. And that’s what matters.

But now, I need to hydrate. My throat burns from the smoke clinging to the humid air, and my hair is plastered to my temples.

“Good work in there, Thorne.” Chief’s voice carries over the organized chaos of overhaul, the scratch of pike poles, the crunch of boots on broken glass, the steady drum of water from the deck gun raining down on hotspots. He hands me an ice-cold bottle of water.

“Thank you, sir.” I straighten and untwist the cap, taking a long swig. “We found the three employees in the walk-in freezer. Smart thinking on their part, the insulated walls bought them time.”

“Probably saved their lives.”

Before I can agree, a movement just past him catches my eye. A certain firefighter is making his way toward me. Despite being nearly twice my size, Mack moves with surprising grace, and even though I can’t see his last name on the back of his uniform, I’d recognize that broad frame and long stride anywhere. His steps falter when he spots Chief, but he keeps coming. Seemingly determined to check on me, the overprotective giant.

Mack removes his helmet as he approaches. Sweat has transformed his copper hair to burgundy. It lies matted against his skin, and soot streaks his face. But that’s not what sends a peal of concern slithering down my spine. It’s the determined look in his striking green eyes. And the way his jaw is clenched so hard I see the muscle ticking.

Oh no.I know that piercing look. I saw it only hours ago, before dawn this morning, when Mack insisted on escorting me all the way to my apartment building. It’s the expression that made me grab his shirt and drag him down for one final fleeting kiss before we said goodbye. Before I jabbed the button in the elevator for my floor and then broke down the second the doors slid closed.

But the intensity radiating off him now? The way his shoulders are set as if he’s preparing to move a mountain? My pulse skips a beat. Then another as I draw a shaky breath and debate whatto do. There’s no doubt in my mind Mack’s about to throw our agreement out the window, along with my career goals and everything I’ve worked so hard to achieve.

I want to jump up, to cut him off before he can say whatever’s about to come out of his mouth. To remind him how we agreed last night was one and done. No matter how much it hurts. But my legs tremble, and Chief is right here, and—

“You okay?” Mack asks, his voice rough. The choked emotion altering his tone makes it seem as if Mack doesn’t really care about the answer, but I know better.

I turn away but nod, unable to form words around a lump the size of Manhattan in my throat.

Chief flicks a glance between us.

“Mack,” he says, sternly before pausing as if carefully choosing his words, “did you want to discuss that transfer request you dropped on my desk this morning, before the call?”

I suck in a sharp breath, the crinkle of the plastic water bottle in my hand announcing my white-knuckled grip as my eyes snap to his.Transfer request?

Mack doesn’t spare me a glance. “I’m not sure now’s the best time, sir.”

“You listed the reason asPersonal,” Chief presses, studying Mack carefully. “Care to elaborate?”

Mack’s lips press into a paper-thin line. It’s a beat before he sighs and launches into what seems like a prepared speech. “First, I want to say what an honor it’s been serving under your command, sir. This crew, this station, it’s become family. Leaving is the last thing I want to do, but…” He trails off, only then shooting me an uncomfortable glance.

Chief’s expression hardens, and the older man takes a step forward, positioning his body in front of mine as if shielding me. “If you’re having an issue working with Thorne foranyreason—”

“What? No!” Mack’s eyes go wide. “That’s not… I mean, I don’t have an issue because Thorne is a woman. Well, I suppose that’s technically not true, but…” He runs a hand through his hair, making the wet strands spike in chaotic directions. “I don’t have an issue working alongside a woman. Any other woman, that is. I swear it on my life. Sir, the problem is, I can’t serve next to Maya because…because I’ve fallen in love with her.”

The words hang in the muggy air like storm clouds gathering over Manhattan. My heart thunders in my ribcage, and before I can process what’s happening right now, Chief turns to me. “Is this true?”

I’m shellshocked and can’t help but glance up, craning my neck to meet Mack’s gaze. It’s a mistake because those fathomless green eyes, along with the profession of love and the sacrifice he was willing to make, have my carefully constructed walls crumbling like sand.

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