She had laughed out loud at that, a trembling hand pressed to her mouth. She didn’t feel bad about Gabriel’s anger toward James. It wasn’t like Gabriel could actually hurt him. He just wanted her to know that he’d protect her, keep her safe, and he wanted to make her laugh, like he always did.
Don’t ever let someone make you feel like another person’s sins are your fault, especially not some self-righteous, Bible-thumping bastard. He doesn’t deserve you if he treats you that way.
People that hide their cruelty behind a mask of piety are even more terrible than the ones that are openly evil. You don’t see them coming until it’s too late, and even when they hurt you, they blame you for it.
She’d considered that, worried over what he meant, until she’d given in to the urge to ask him.
Did someone hurt you that way? Did they blame you, too?
She wasn’t sure he’d answer, it was such an intimate and personal thing to ask, but he surprised her.
They hurt me and other people I cared about, and no one believed any of us.
She felt less alone knowing he’d experienced the same kind of hurt, and she wondered again what had led to him killing his father. She was so certain about his pain, that he hadn’t really been the spoiled brat the media had depicted, but she didn’t want to press too hard.
She had written only
I’m so sorry.
And
I believe you.
and then, thinking of Mrs. Newberry and Kennedy’s parents
I know so many people of faith that have good hearts and love God, but I also know people who pretend to have faith as an excuse to hurt others. You expect kindness and love, but they spew hatred and judgment. You deserved better than whatever happened to you.
She wasn’t sure what impulse had overtaken her, but she’d scrawled her phone number hastily on the bottom of the letter and put it in the outgoing mail before she could change her mind. She wasn’t sure if he’d call and there was nothing she could do but wait.
“You look jumpy,” Lilly sat down beside her as the other members of the Bible group roamed around the room nibbling on snacks and talking about the plans for the Christmas toy drive.
“I am,” Mia admitted with a smile. “I haven’t felt like myself the past few weeks.”
“Have you told your dad about changing your major yet?”
Mia could hear the hesitant worry in her voice, and she shook her head as she picked at a piece of lint on her skirt. “I’m sorry, I know it bothers you, keeping my secrets.”
“I’m worried and I don’t think I’m the only one that’s noticed you seem off lately. You aren’t really talking to anyone, and you haven’t been out with James at all. I think he’s starting to wonder if you’re still interested.”
“I thinkI’mtrying to figure out if I’m still interested.”
“Really?” Lilly’s face crinkled in concern. “Did the dates not go well?”
Mia shrugged and shot her a small, reassuring smile. “I think he’s only interested in me because he thinks I would make a good pastor’s wife. He doesn’t seem to care much about who I am or what I want out of life.”
“Oh.”
She sounded so disappointed that Mia bumped her shoulder affectionately. “I want what you have with Bryce. Someone that knows me and loves what I am, not what he wants me to be.”
That soothed the worry from Lilly’s brow. “I really did get lucky with Bryce, didn’t I?”
“You truly did,” Mia muttered, but her attention was on Mrs. Newberry as she made the rounds with her usual gossip. Heads were turning too often in their direction, and Mia had the unpleasant feeling that they were the subject of the night’s discussions. “Why is she always causing problems?” Mia asked, jerking her chin toward Mrs. Newberry.
Lilly turned to look and rolled her eyes. “She’s not happy about my new role in the group. I guess she thinks she should’ve been next in line to take over after Mrs. Mitchell, even though all she’s done is complain about every single project.”
“Bitch,” Mia mumbled beneath her breath, and her cheeks turned hot when Lilly sucked in a breath and looked at her in horror.
“Mia,” she hissed. “You can’t say that in here! What’s … How did … Where did you even pick up a cursing habit?”