Page 57 of Anchor

Hammer looks at me and gives me a sad smile before replying to Steal, “Your mother and I decided to return when we heard Heaven was in a coma, and we knew the crap he was about to receive from the club; she’s gone to the house to air it out.” He looks around the room. “Anchor and Heaven married on Heaven’s high school graduation day, a few months later, they had found out Heaven was pregnant with Micha. Now, at the time, we had a traitor. Prospects’ women, even ones they just hooked up with outside the compound, were found dead, murdered by The Killers. At the time, we had no idea who was involved. We didn’t want what happened to the women to happen to Heaven, or worse, to Micha.”

“So, explain what happened with Ginger?” Tank asks from the back, where he’s sitting with some older generation.

I sigh and admit, “I didn’t want to be a brother,” shocking them. “Everyone here knows what Dad did to Mom, that she had to bring up his affair, baby.” I send my little sister a wince who just grins at me with tears in her eyes. “I was petrified the cut would get to my head, and I’d hurt my woman, and I was right. WhenI patched in, I wanted nothing more than to celebrate with the club, to prove to my dad that I’m in this, that I’ll be better, but when I went to grab my wife, to finally show her off, she’d just finished nursing our two-month-old, and refused to come. She got angry at me, and I called her selfish, then left her with our son.” The brother's mouths drop open while the women scowl at me, and rightfully so.

I huff. “I was so fucking angry at her. In my head, she wasn’t supporting me; in my head, I’d done everything for her, yet she couldn’t do this one fucking thing for me, so I came back here, got drunk, and Ginger caught my eye, just like she did in high school that one time behind the bleachers.”

“Fuck’s sake, Anchor,” Bulldozer snaps.

I nod, then admit, “I was a fucking idiot.”

“I can kind of understand your mindset. I guess if she wasn’t the wife she should have been, to be your other half…” Candice, Tanks old lady says with a furrowed brow.

I raise a brow and add, “Did I also mention she was two months post-partum, tired, never left our son with anyone, breastfeeding, and it was our first wedding anniversary, where I planned to cook her a meal, which I forgot?” Her brown eyes widen in shock. “She also quit college so I could continue with my business degree, and took on night shifts at a retirement home until about six years ago, and started bartending at Jimmy’s Girls, refusing to accept the money I’ve been transferring her.”

“I take it back, you’re a jackass,” she says.

I nod. “Yep, and that is what she carved into the tank of my bike before one of our couple therapy sessions, after Ginger decided to lie to her at the grocery store, stating I was fucking her.”

Steal butts in, “Heaven was the best girlfriend and wife to Anchor. She put her dreams on hold so he could give everything to the club, and Ginger wasn’t just a clubwhore; she was Heaven’s high school bully for her last year of school, hating that Anchor didn’t choose her, and yet Heaven never told him what was going on.” He looks around the room. “For ten years, she’s been filing for divorce, not wanting anything but to be free of a man who could hurt her in a way she never thought he would. Ten years he’s been trying to prove to her he loved her, all while not knowing Ginger was causing shit behind the scenes, and that her mother was badmouthing him, not wanting her daughter with a man who could hurt her that way.”

I swallow the emotions wanting to take hold, and I finish, “She finally agreed to couple’s therapy, but in her mind, it was to finish us for good.” I look around the room. “Before the accident, she finally agreed to give me an actual chance to prove myself.”

“Why isn’t she here now?” my sister asks, and I wince.

“Heaven wants nothing to do with the club, and she doesn’t want Micha here, either,” my dad says loudly, then points at me. “The idiot, here, not realizing she was being discharged last week, thought it would be a good idea to have her wait in this room while he was in church because he was worried she’d run to the house he emptied while she was in her coma, not remembering Ginger was here.”

The brothers wince, and the women openly curse at me.

“You’re pushing her away,” Art says from beside me. I look his way, not denying it, and he demands, “Why?”

I look at Steal, who tilts his head while Acid comes up beside me and says, “As some of you heard that day, Heaven was pregnant, and she lost the baby.”

My sister sniffles while the brothers’ eyes soften, some still full of shock.

“I’m the reason she was pregnant to begin with,” I state and my mom chimes in and snaps, “It takes two, son, you shouldn’t blame yourself.”

I grit my teeth and snap back, “I fucked with her birth control!” Mom’s mouth drops in shock, and I sigh, running my hand through my hair before Moira, Steal’s and Cassidy’s little girl, runs my way. I smile at my best friend’s daughter and pick her up before her arms wrap around my neck. I hold her close before looking back at my mom.

“If I hadn’t messed with her birth control, she wouldn’t have been pregnant during the incident, meaning she never would have felt the pain of losing our child, so yes, I’m pulling myself away from her…unintentionally, and I messed up, yet again, last week because of it.”

Piston offers, “But she’s still here, brother.”

I kiss Moira’s head before handing her off to her dad. Then I answer Piston, “Because when she tried to walk off, I threatened to keep our son from her.” I look around the room. “Something, by the way, she has never done with me. The only thing she said after I did what I did ten years ago was that I couldn’t have him overnight while she was nursing and that he wasn’t allowed here.”

“Brother,” Steal says, and I look his way, “she tried dating but always took the call when Micha called her, allowing him to ruin them, she kept going back to you, she said yes to couple’s therapy, fuck, she stayed, knowing you fucked with her birth control…. She won’t leave you now because of your threats.”

“He’s right,” Hammer says, and I look his way. “She loves you and knows your threats are bullshit. Don’t give up….”

Twenty minutes later, I silently open my front door. The fireplace is lit, the pictures of Heaven, Micha, and I littering the shelf above it. My son is immersed in his soccer videogame, his eyes on the TV in the corner. I smile as I remove my cut, hanging it up.

“Hey, Bud,” I say quietly, and he turns his head my way, grinning.

“Hi, Dad,” he replies before returning to the TV to pause his game.

“Where’s Mom?” I ask him, and he points to the open kitchen, and I see Heaven standing outside in the yard, and I swallow hard.

“Hey, Dad,” Micha says, getting my attention. I look his way to see him frowning. “When will I get to go to the clubhouse?” he asks, and I sigh.

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