Page 98 of The First Mistake

‘The dog part or the Josh part?’

‘You’re being ridiculous,’ he says wearily. ‘I got the train down to see the dog and bumped into Josh at Waterloo, on my way back. He was just heading home after work and one beer turned into three ... you know how it is.’

‘So, what time did you get in?’ she asks as he holds the door to the bank open for her.

He attempts to laugh. ‘I wish I knew. Around one. Maybe two.’ He sounds more unsure with every number.

‘So you weren’t withher?’ asks Alice, surprising even herself. Of all the times and places she’d imagined having this conversation, it wasn’t now, in a bank queue. She wishes she could suck it back in, but the best she can hope for is that he didn’t hear her.

‘Her?’ he repeats, as if he’s hoping he’s misheard.

Alice turns to look at him, jutting her chin out in an act of defiance. She doesn’t say anything because she doesn’t trust her voice.

‘Are we honestly going to go there again?’ he asks incredulously, under his breath.

‘I haven’t even started,’ hisses Alice.

He throws his arms up in the air. ‘What are you going to accuse me of this time?’

‘I saw the text,’ is all she says.

Nathan looks around, checking who’s in listening distance. A mum with a noisy toddler is in front of them and an elderly gentleman is a few feet behind them. Neither will be able to hear very much.

‘What text?’ he says.

‘The text fromher.’ She almost spits it out. ‘The one where she begs for you.’

Nathan shakes his head and looks at her as if to say,Poor Alice, you need help. She remembers a nurse doing the very same thing when she was in the unit, and how she used to fantasize that when she got out, she’d break into her house and just sit there in the corner of her front room. She wouldn’t speak, just slowly shake her head and pull her mouth into a pitying smirk.

Alice opens the photos on her phone and hands him the screenshot of the text he’d received in Japan. She watches as the colour drains from his cheeks.

‘Did you go to her Nathan? Did you give her what she needed?’

She’s never seen him speechless before. He always has just the right words for every situation. But not for this one, it seems.

‘I didn’t want to tell you,’ he starts, and Alice can already feel the tightening at the back of her throat that signals tears are imminent.

‘I can’t do this here,’ she says, turning and striding out of the bank.

Nathan catches up with her outside and forcibly pushes her into an alley, out of sight of shoppers.

‘Listen to me,’ he says, authoritatively. ‘I don’t know who she is.’

Alice laughs and cries simultaneously. ‘Are you serious? You’re honestly expecting me to believe that?’

‘I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want to worry you. I’ve had three or four similar texts, all from the same number, but I don’t know who it is.’

Alice wipes her nose with the back of her hand. ‘I can’t believe this is the tack you’re going to take. I expected more from you, Nathan. You’re an intelligent man – I thought you’d have your excuses all ready to go, but I’m truly disappointed that that’s all you’ve got to offer.’

He takes hold of her shoulders, his face just a few centimetres away from her. ‘You need to believe me because it’s true. I’ve tried calling the number again and again, but it just rings. I’ve texted it but had no response.’

‘And yet there’s nothing on your phone to prove your story,’ says Alice. ‘In fact, there’s no trace of anything apart from the one message that I saw. No attempt by you to find out who it is. No attempt to block the number. Nothing, apart from a dirty text.’

He gets his phone out, scrolls through his recent calls and turns the screen to face Alice. ‘Look, there,’ he says, jabbing a finger at a number. ‘I’ve called it fifteen times today alone.’

‘God, you must be crazy about her,’ snorts Alice derisively.

‘For fuck’s sake, I don’t know who it is,’ he says as he rakes a hand manically through his hair. ‘Here, take it, try it yourself. If we’re having some mad passionate affair, you’d assume she’d pick up as soon as she sees it’s me.’

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