She smiles now. “He loved films. We watched so many together and he would talk about how it was lit and the special effects. He was always testing that stuff. That’s why he wanted to go big when we faked a death—show his skills. But I shouldn’t have let him do that to you.”
“You did that to others?”
“Yes. But they were nasty, little boys. I didn’t feel sorry for them at all. They ran and never looked back. But you… I knew what we did would haunt you. I’m so sorry.”
I don’t know what to say to that. I wait. I want to see what she will say next.
“And Harm wasn’t lying, Sami. I did fall for you. He saw it before I did, I think. You were like this beacon of goodness in all this dark. I wasn’t worthy of it, but at least I could bask in it a little while. You know? You’d smile at me, and it felt like all the bad would go away. Like we could be happy. It was almost cruel. Being with you. You were everything I wanted, so yes, I kept making excuses, even though I knew it wouldn’t last. But I never forgot you. Or how I felt. Or what I did to you. And when I saw your photo on the news, when I looked you up and realized you hadn’t become a doctor like you said and so much had gone wrong, that’s why I came to see you. To let you knowyou hadn’t killed anyone. To let you know it was all okay and that I was sorry for what I’d done to that wonderful, sweet boy.”
Her words pummel me. They are supposed to be kind, but I don’t deserve them. She was right there, right in front of me, suffering, in trouble, and was I able to see or help?
“So why did you run?”
“When you saw me, I panicked. I knew that you recognized me. So you’d know I was alive and nothing bad happened that night. And I just…” She shakes her head. “It’s not just about you and me, is it, Sami?”
“What do you mean?”
She shakes her head again.
“Did you ever have amnesia?” I ask.
“I want you to promise me something first.”
“What?”
“Because it’s not so black-and-white. What happened. Some of it is real and some of it is not. But the important things? The things that really matter? Those are real.”
I have no idea what she’s talking about, so I nod to keep her talking.
“They are such good, decent people, my family. What happened, all those years of torment, it haunts them. They were so hurt, and now I need to protect them. Do you understand?”
“No, not really.”
“You sense it, don’t you?”
“Sense what?”
“That they are kind. That they’ve been hurt and damaged, but when you strip away all the money and trappings, you can see their goodness.”
I think about it because it seems to mean so much to her. “I guess I do.”
“And I love them with all my heart, Kierce. Mom, Dad, Thomas,Maddy, my nieces—especially my nieces. I love them. And I love my life. You need to understand that.”
“Okay,” I say, just to say something because I don’t know what she’s getting at. “So what happened on New Year’s Eve? How did you end up in Spain?”
“Promise me first.”
“Promise you what?”
“That you won’t hurt them. That you’ll protect them.”
“Protect them from what?” Then seeing that isn’t going to get me anywhere, I go for the surrender: “I promise. I’ll protect them.”
“How did Harm end up in Nashville?”
“I don’t really know. He said something about you guys scamming the wrong guy. Do you remember that?”
“Yeah,” she says. “He’s the one who beat me.”