Page 54 of Burning Beauty

Maria shuddered and curled into a ball again as the horrible night flashed through her head for the hundredth time. "He doesn't answer to me."

Cassandra didn't say anything for a long time, then finally, "I think you're wrong. Whether you like it or not, he answers to you now. He's the boss, but he cares what you think. You've changed him."

"I don't care! He's changed me! I'll have nightmares about this for the rest of my life," Maria snarled, curling tighter. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Of course," Cassandra quickly agreed. "I'm going down to supper, I'll have Yara send a tray up."

Maria didn't respond and Cassandra finally left. She felt bad. She should've been nicer. Cassandra was such a sweetheart, trying to pull Maria back to the land of the living, like Maria had done for her. Only Cassandra didn't know, she couldn't understand, there was no coming back for Maria. Her whole world had shattered, and she was no longer the same.

She drifted off and when she woke up it was dark out and the lingering scent of food was in the air. For the first time in days, her stomach growled. She had been nauseous at the thought of food before this, so the discovery of an appetite was a nice change.

She pushed herself up and tossed the blankets back, realizing that someone must have covered her. She was a mess. Her hair felt like a giant tangle on top of her head and she was wearing the same baggy sweatpants and hoodie from the day before.

"You're always beautiful."

Maria jumped so violently she slid off the edge of the bed and onto her ass. She reached out to grab at the blankets and pull herself back up. A chill went through her as she realized Nic was sitting in the armchair in the corner. He was steeped in shadows and she had to squint to make him out. He was sitting with one leg crossed over the other at the knee. She caught the faint scent of a cigar and realized he was smoking. He almost never smoked inside. The balcony door was wide open next to him, and she guessed that he had pulled the blanket over her to keep her warm while he smoked and watched her.

He must have caught her looking down at herself and read her mind, assuming she was feeling self-conscious after two days of not showering. Maria was a ridiculously clean person. She took personal hygiene to a new level and made sure everything around her was tidy. She'd picked up these habits from her strict taskmaster of a mother. Two days of not showering had Maria wrinkling her nose at herself and would probably have her mother rolling in her grave.

"You need to eat," Nic said, pointing toward the tray sitting on top of the dresser, then flicking the ash of his cigar into an ashtray on the table next to him.

Maria didn't say anything. She just stared at him, willing him to leave. Her newfound appetite fled once more, and she knew she wouldn't be touching the contents of that tray. Nic must have guessed as much because his voice was sharp when he said, "This can't go on, Maria. Cassandra says you haven't touched solid food since..." His voice trailed off and he growled in frustration. "You have to eat."

She refused to speak, refused to get up and approach the tray, partly because she wouldn't give him the satisfaction, but also because she was too frightened to move. Every time she looked at him, she saw those brass knuckles or the gun. She saw blood all over the driveway and the satisfied look in his eyes as he watched his victim die. Did he have his gun on him now or was it locked up somewhere safe?

He ashed his cigar impatiently and stood, striding toward Maria with a suddenness that shocked her. She flung herself backwards on the bed and crab-walked until her back hit the headboard, then she pulled her knees up and hugged herself. He paused, surprise on his face as he realized just how frightened she was. Then she caught a flash of despair before his face settled into familiar dispassionate lines. That tiny moment in time, the despair she saw on his face, it pulled at something inside her; an answering despair. He cared about her, maybe even loved her.

Then he set his jaw in a determined line and kneeled on the bed, reaching for her. She let out a shriek and slapped at him as he hauled her off the bed. He stood her on her feet in front of him and gave her a quick, vicious shake, as though he was trying to snap her out of her stupor.

Before he could speak the door flew open and a massive man filled the entrance. Maria blinked at him, realizing she recognized him. He was her new bodyguard, stationed in the hallway, watching over her. He'd been the one to turn her around when she tried to go back to her room.

"Everything okay?" he asked hesitantly, his eyes on Maria. His look was respectful, and he was genuinely concerned for her. Maria's heart froze as she realized Nic might consider this insubordination and kill the man. She was about to start pleading with Nic when he spoke.

"She's fine," Nic said, his voice as cool as always. "Stay close in case she needs anything."

The man nodded and left, closing the door behind him.

Maria stared after him, relieved that he wouldn't die for interrupting Nic.

When she looked up at him, she realized Nic was watching her carefully. "You were scared that I was going to kill him, weren't you?"

Maria's eyes grew wide and she gripped his sleeve. "Please don't kill him," she begged.

"I'm not going to kill him," Nic growled, dragging a hand through his hair. "I don't go around killing just anyone. There must be a reason. My people must understand that loyalty will be rewarded, while incompetence will be punished."

Maria licked her lips uncertainly, then said, "But Antonio didn't know. Y-you killed him. You didn't have to. You could've just let him go."

"No." Nic shook his head grimly. "He needed to be an example of what will happen if anyone fucks up with you. He knew what he was getting into when entering my employ."

"I didn't know!" Maria cried, shoving at his chest, trying to push him away. "I didn't know what I was getting into."

"You didn't have a choice," Nic agreed grimly.

Maria continued speaking as if he hadn't said anything. "I didn't know I would love you, and I didn't know you would kill someone in front of me."

His stricken expression gave her strength. Her heart cried out for him, but she knew better. She knew what her heart didn't know, Nic was a monster. If she stayed with him, he would eventually kill her.

"I'm sorry, bella," he said, agony clear in his voice.