Page 65 of Swan

At least he was a good guy.

Thank fuck for that, or it wouldn’t only be me after him. I still remembered the first time he’d come to our place for dinner. Dad had taken his knives out and threatened him. Cody had backed Dad up with the threat, and later, I’d tested him to see how he’d take a little teasing. He handled it well until I’d picked on my sister, and then the dick had punched me.

Good times, I thought as I walked through the store to the stairs that led me up to offices and then out the back where my place sat. I entered the open-plan dining, kitchen, and living area.

It was a good apartment, which was why I’d jumped at the chance for a space without the rest of my family in it. I was a selfish arse when it came to my alone time.

Now I could jack off whenever I wanted without risking Mum, Dad, or Ruby walking in on me.

I had my first sexual encounter when I was sixteen. Not that anyone knew. It’d been a girl from school, and I’d gone back to her place to play some video games. I never thought we’d be screwing until it happened.

I’d had a few other women since then, until I spotted Swan one day at the compound and the air had lodged itself in my throat from the sight of her.

She’d been in a red top, which left her back exposed, and a pair of blue jeans with bare feet.

The clothes weren’t anything special, but they were clinging to her beautiful curves as the sun had shone down on her, almost making her glow.

Her hair had been near white when she was younger. It had darkened over the years, and she’d since dyed it at a salon. She must have just had it done that time that everything changed for me. It fell in waves over her right shoulder. She’d had her elbows to the picnic table and a book in her hand. I didn’t know if she knew, but her lips slightly moved sometimes when she read.

I hadn’t been able to tear my eyes away from her.

My cock had swelled. My heart had jumped around under my ribs like it was on crack. I’d wanted to touch the back of her neck and run my fingers down over her warm flesh to where her jeans covered her round arse.

That was the day I’d woken up.

It was the day I finally saw what beauty really was.

And since then, I’d been a goner for Swan Daniels.

She thought my flirting was me just trying to be an idiot or test out lines on her. It never had.

Sometimes I even cringed at the shit that came out of my mouth, but I’d just wanted to see her smile or get her to blush or laugh or playfully shove me as she rolled her eyes.

I honestly scared myself by how much I wanted to be around her. If I could glue myself to her, I would. That shit was messed up. She didn’t see me as anything but a friend.

And even if her feelings changed and she grew to love me, I couldn’t ever let her know just how possessive and obsessed I was over her.

“Christ,” I bit out as I stalked to the refrigerator and pulled open the door. I grabbed out a beer and unscrewed the cap to take a long drink.

When would I get to see her again? I wanted it to be tomorrow and the next day and the next. But I wasn’t too much of a stalker yet.

I hung back when she went in and out from her appointments. I was there in case someone recognised her in her vulnerable state and started hounding her. The only time I’d made myself known was when I’d seen her crying, and I couldn’t help but fulfill the need to comfort her.

My sweet little birdy was in pain.

I wanted to fix everything for her, but there was nothing I could do.

Sighing, I went to the couch and pulled out my phone before I slouched onto the leather. I scrolled through some sites, typing in Swan’s or Lockland’s name to see if anything new popped up.

Nothing did, thank fuck. It burned my gut knowing that she’d seen some of the crap people had spewed online about her.

No one knew her like I did. Like her family did. Like the club did. She’d never hurt a damn fly, and I knew she wished it’d been her taken away instead of Lockland. But I wasn’t sure I would have survived without her. I was that gone that I worried I’d want to follow.

There was no one else for me. Swan would be the only woman I loved.

Even if she didn’t love me back.

So if I could, I’d thank Lockland for his sacrifice to keep her alive. He’d always be her first love, but I could only hope I’d be her last.

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