Page 123 of Caelum

By my sides, Frazer and Stefan froze in surprise, and the others’ speech finally stuttered into silence.

Before they could say another word, I surged upward, uncaring I almost tipped Frazer back onto his behind, and straightened so I could glare at them all.

Every single one of them.

I was done with being passive. With letting them boss me around. Enough was enough.

“I didn’t choose anyone,” I gritted out. “Whether or not some insane part of me did is another matter entirely. I didn’t actively choose Stefan, Frazer, or Reed.” I wasn’t sure why that was so important to me, but it was.

I needed them to understand that. Needed it, if only to get Dre to stop looking at me the way he was.

I knew I was trouble without him constantly glowering at me with a reminder of how much shit—yes, shit—I’d brought into these unknowing boys’ lives.

“It doesn’t matter how you did it,” Eren countered, his tone stiff. “You still did. They’re marked.”

My throat closed as I stared at Reed. He was now shirtless and showing something I’d learned was called a six-pack. I’d never seen bellies like the ones the boys had before. They were interesting. My fingers wanted to feel between the muscular ridges, and though that level of exploration wasn’t something I’d ever contemplated before, I was changing.

Caelum was making me adapt to this new world I found myself in.

Evolution.

Eve-style.

My throat was tight when I whispered, “I can’t bear for you to be tied to me if you don’t want to be.” Reed, Stefan, and Frazer had all tensed at the start of my sentence, but by the end, they’d relaxed some—did that mean they wanted to be free of me? And if they did, how could I blame them?

I hadn’t even told them the worst of it yet. We were only breaking the surface on how different I was, and to them, this was already calamitous.

“That isn’t how this works,” Eren told me kindly, his warm, amber eyes gentle as he smiled at me, trying to calm me down.

As my gaze connected with his, as I breathed when he did, I allowed him to do that. Allowed him to help me.

Why Eren could, I wasn’t sure. I was just glad something in me responded to the serenity in him.

“Can’t you break it?” I stated rationally, and despite wanting to rage seconds before, Eren had truly helped calm me down. I knew what it was like to be without free will, and knowing I’d done this to them killed me inside.

Stefan’s hand grabbed mine, making me realize he’d gotten to his feet too. He hauled me into his arms and didn’t let me pull away from him. He curved his body around mine, imbuing me with strength I didn’t need but appreciated.

I was confused, so confused, but mostly, I hated that I’d taken away their free will.

That was what disturbed me the most, I was coming to realize.

I’d had no free will until Caelum, and having lived the difference, I knew the true heinousness of what I’d done—albeit unknowingly.

“You did nothing we’re not happy about,” Stefan told me, his lipsbrushing my temple. “The several mates thing comes as a shock, but…” He blew out a breath. “We’ll deal with that as it comes.”

Dre grunted—my face was turned into Stefan’s throat, but I knew that sound well enough to know it was him without having to shoot the jerk a look.

“Shut up, Dre,” Eren hissed, and I heard another grunt—proof that Eren had just elbowed him in the side again. “Where do we go from here?”

Stefan’s hand began moving up and down my back, and the gesture was soothing, but I wasn’t a baby. I wasn’t hiding from this, nor was I scared. I was just perplexed and hated what I’d done without even knowing it.

My life was…

Goodness, I didn’t know what. My mind was different than theirs. Even though I’d found a haven of sorts here at Caelum, I’d known from that first meeting with Nicholas, the principal, I wasn’t the same as everyone else.

They didn’t know what they were dealing with, and I couldn’t help them because I didn’t know either.

Before they could start talking again, I pushed away from Stefan’s hold. He tried to cling to me, and when I looked at his face, I knew it wasn’t just for my comfort but for his. That alone made me want to stay, but I couldn’t. I had to look at them all while I revealed the truth to them, had to see their responses, and monitor their potential revulsion.

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