Page 10 of Caelum

In the short time I’d come to know her, I was used to being confused, so I just let it wash over me, focusing instead on Nicholas. To be dragged to this office, which was beyond grand with furniture so richly opulent, I felt as though I were in some kind of den of iniquity, and I recognized that he had to be powerful.

The luster on the desk alone was like silk, and if I peered into the grain, I knew I’d see my reflection. In contrast to the grim cabin where I’d lived all my life, the desk alone spoke of untold luxuries.

Even though I’d told myself I’d be quiet, the desk, this room, and the air of wealth in this place had curiosity prompting me to ask, “Are you the equivalent of Father Bryan?”

“Yeah, Nick, are you like that old pervert?”

Nicholas grunted at Merinda’s amusement. “In the sense that I am the head of the Academy, yes. I’m the leader.”

“Will I have to marry you?”

Merry chuckled at that, but Nicholas’s eyes turned stormy. “No. Marriage isn’t required to be instructed here.”

That had me relaxing and my smile deepened with relief.

“I know Merinda has told you the basics, but now that you’re here, I wish to explain your situation more.”

“I’m grateful for that. I don’t really understand everything Merinda says.”

“That’s because she talks like Jane Austen,” the woman complained.

I had no idea who Jane Austen was. “If you say so.”

Nicholas’s lips curved before he flattened them into a thin line. It was interesting how the move hardened his face.

He was older, in his forties, I thought, and even as I wondered what relationship Merry had with him to be so at ease in his presence, he began to explain, “Most of the children who come here are already at a disadvantage. But it’s different than your situation. You are of this world but also not of this world. Everyone speaks like Merry. It’s the common vernacular. We’re not formal, and although we have rules we have to follow, you won’t be beaten if you break them.

“You won’t be married off at eighteen. You won’t be confinedto your room or to this island once you’re of age. You’re here for your safety, and while I’m certain Father Bryan told you something similar, that the outside of your compound was filled with dangers, you’re here by choice. You know that you’re different, and those things that make you different are why you need to be here.”

Because he was right about what Father Bryan said, I believed him more. “I’m here by choice,” I told him softly. “I need help. Merinda says I have great control but that it won’t last forever.”

“It won’t.” His jaw clenched. “You need help, and we’re here for that.”

“What disadvantages do other children have who come here?” I questioned, ashamed that I felt relief to know they were strange too.

“They believe they have something called schizophrenia.”

“What is that?”

“It’s a mental disorder.”

Merry clucked her tongue in disgust. “Until we’re eleven, we’re pretty normal. Then it hits us. All of a sudden, we start acting out and hearing voices in our heads. Making decisions becomes hard. We experience blackouts. If we were sociable before, we become unsociable. It’s like a switch. One day we’re normal, the next, we’re not.”

Because I remembered those times clearly—the memories were enough to make me want to scurry away and hide—I understood. “Schizophrenia is bad?”

Nicholas hesitated. “Not bad, but it’s a disorder. Most don’t understand it, and some even fear it. It can cloud people’s opinions of you.”Hello judgment, my old friend,I thought sadly. “Children with the disorder take medication—it’s a substance that helps heal us, or in this instance, makes us appear more normal—and for a time, it works on us until it just stops.

“We don’t have schizophrenia; we just appear to have it. That isn’t to say it doesn’t exist. It does. But in humans. We’re not like them.

“After a while, the meds that lulled us into some semblance of normality do nothing more than exacerbate what they were supposed to control. That’s when our parents truly begin to fear us.” He reached up and tugged at his bottom lip, and I knew that even though this had all happened to him a long time ago, the memories were as fresh as if they had happened yesterday. “The voices in our head, Eve, aren’t just hallucinations. They’re souls.”

My eyes widened at that. “Souls?” I rasped, my voice breaking as I recalled the New Order’s teachings.

His smile was lopsided. “Not like the ones you know of. There are seven of them inside us, Eve. Until we are twenty-one, thoseseven fight it out amongst themselves until a single, dominant one takes control. Until that happens, we teach and guide you. Help your souls discern which is the strongest so that you can fulfil your true potential.”

Mouth gaping, I stared at Merry, and when she nodded, the gesture one of encouragement, I swallowed and shut my mouth. They didn’t bombard me with more words, just allowed me to come to terms with everything he’d said. When I didn’t feel like I was about to go insane, I whispered, “So, the things I hear?—”

“They’re real.”

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