Page 11 of Silenced

No, he…

That’s when I realize this isn’t Harvey.

It can’t be.

It might have been the man I married, but he hasn’t been that elusive gentleman since our first year of wedded ‘bliss.’

I can’t smell disinfectant so I know I’m not in a hospital—I’ve been in enough to recognize that inherent scent—nor can I feel the motion of an ambulance beneath me.

If anything, I can smell cologne and, against my back, I can feel carpet.

His scent is expensive,rich, but it contrasts with the dirt from the rug, the smell of sweat andfeet.Dirty feet. And rat urine.God.

I groan as it makes me puke again, which is when I get confirmation—this. Is. Not. Harvey.

As the stranger gently turns me over, his finger pops into my mouth. It makes me gag more but he tucks my tongue down as if he’s concerned I’ll choke on it…

I force myself to focus and through the so-called high of the drugs, I can see the blurred edges of a face that belongs to a fallen angel.

“Am I dying?” I slur between bouts of retching.

I have to be.

An angel has come to save me, and just like Harvey promised, I’m going to Hell.

The notion doesn’t scare me. If anything, it seems a better option than dealing with my ex-husband anymore.

I’m used to being tortured.

Maybe I’ll be lucky and there’ll be nothingafter.

Damn, I can’t even describe the welter of relief that floods me at the thought.

Death would be a release.

Freedom.

I sigh at the idea and sink into unconsciousness, uncaring if I choke on my vomit, just hoping that this is the last of it.

The end of me.

3

CASSIE

Toll - So Below

* * *

My head falls back.

Again.

Not unlike before, it drags me awake but the nausea from earlier isn’t as strong. The pain is though. It’s worse. Five times worse.

I can feel tears leaking from my eyes as I’m jostled, then I realize that I’m covered. My semi-nudity is shielded by somethingthin.

I blink my tired, crusty, stinging eyes open and see a yellowed sheet covering me. Before I can tip my head forward, a hand is there, supporting it. That’s when I find the fallen angel from earlier staring at me, his eyes…

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