Page 25 of Twenty Years Later

I'd certainly had that... for years. But not in a long while. My heart began to ache at what I was missing, the loneliness of going it alone for the last four years.

Watching Alex take a sip of his wine, I dared to imagine the possibilities of this man sitting at our kitchen table every evening, this man to talk to at the end of the day and snuggle with all night.

I sighed quietly to myself because I just shouldn't go there since that would never happen. And even if it did by some miracle, I could never let it happen. Not after making that vow to Blake.

"Hey," Alex said, interrupting my spiraling thoughts. "I keep meaning to apologize to you about leaving last night."

It took me a second to recover from my painful thoughts and figure out what he meant. "Oh, you don't need to apologize."

"Yes, I do. So Gabby spent the night at my parents and I just—I just feel terrible if she wakes them up in the middle of the night, you know?"

With that explanation, my heart suddenly felt much lighter. "I totally get that."

We shared a smile, our eyes connecting as those butterflies made a reappearance. This emotional roller coaster was unbelievable—utterly depressing thoughts a minute ago to pure joy just from his smile.

Gabby began making some very unhappy noises, and Alex picked her up from my lap.

"I think I'd better get you ready for bed." He glanced at me with regret. "Sorry. I'll be right back. Please make yourself comfortable. Maybe after she's asleep, we can watch a movie or something... if you're up for that."

I nodded. "Yeah. That sounds nice."

My pulse sped up at the idea of cuddling up on the couch with Alex and the possibility of what else it might lead to.

Slow down, Jayda.

Taking a deep breath, I studied the living room, looking around for clues as to how he lived. There were a few pieces of art on the walls, but they were sparse. And the way they were arranged was kind of odd, like something was missing.

I stepped closer to one and, yeah, judging by a nail hole in the wall, it looked like there had been something right next to it. Walking around, I noticed even more little holes in the walls. It seemed like his ex had taken her stuff with her, and Alex hadn't even bothered to redecorate. He'd probably meant it when he said he wasn't really into this place.

Alex soon returned with Gabby, who looked so stinking cute in her little unicorn onesie.

"I tried to get her to lie down, but it might be one of those nights where I have to rock her to sleep." He lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "She's just too wound up."

"Oops, my fault probably."

"Nah," Alex said as he sat in the chair. But Gabby had other ideas as she held her tiny hands out to me and started to fuss. "No, no. We can't ask the guest to rock you."

I laughed at his silly tone. "I don't mind. Really. It's been a long time. Audrey outgrew it soon after her first birthday, and I used to love it."

His eyebrows shot up. "Are you sure?"

"Absolutely." I nodded as Gabby fussed some more and started to struggle.

"It's a lot of work some nights," Alex warned.

"Challenge accepted."

Alex's grin was contagious. "Okay. Let's see how you do, Jayda Jenkins. My record is nine minutes." He handed a very annoyed Gabby to me. "Good luck."

She began to calm down the minute I started rocking her in the super plush chair. Watching us, Alex settled in across from me on the couch, a soft smile on his face.

"So do you sing to her or anything?" I asked as she played with my hair, not seeming the least bit tired.

"Sometimes. Just kind of depends."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "So you're not going to help me, huh?"

"You're on your own," he said, that teasing light in his eyes again.

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