Page 43 of Twenty Years Later

She let out a nervous laugh. "Well, that's good. Doyouwant some?"

"Nope. I'm good."

While we ate, we talked about our big weekend together. Jayda was definitely an organizer and had everything all planned out. And as she talked about the history of Portland and some of the spots she wanted to show me, I had to be honest, I half-listened but only because I was so distracted by her, by the way her lips moved and her eyes lit up.

Jayda had this way of showing every emotion she felt on her face, something I loved, something my ex had been very good at hiding. And right now, Jayda's face was all excitement and nerves, animated... but almost too much so, I suddenly realized, like there was an energy about her that was different, and I couldn't put my finger on it. Almost like she was trying to deflect my attention elsewhere.

I hated being suspicious. God, I'd had enough of that with Fiona, always guessing what she was thinking, not being sure of her true feelings. And with Jayda, that had been something so refreshing, that she never tried to hide herself from me.

Sure, she'd been a little shy and uncomfortable around me at first. But there was an honesty and openness about her that I'd never seen in any other woman I'd been with. Ever.

I'd actually noticed that honesty from her way back in high school... even though I'd been an idiot and hadn't realized what a beautiful and rare trait that was at the time. But now I knew. And my heart sunk a bit that there was something off right now.

As we finished our meal, Jayda suddenly stared wide-eyed at me, a finger to her lips, and nodded toward Gabby. I had to stop myself from laughing because Gabby was slumped down in the high chair, her head nodding forward then jerking backward as she fought sleep.

"Poor thing," Jayda whispered as she scooted away from the table.

But I reached Gabby before her and tried to gently remove her from the seat. In my head, I said a silent thank you because I really wanted... no, needed to talk to Jayda and figure out what was up.

Luck was not on my side, though. The minute I put Gabby in the guest room crib, she rose up, wailing her little head off.And she didn't stop.

We both took turns walking her around, rocking, listening to music. Every single time she seemed to calm down, we tried to put her in the crib or even let her play on the floor. But nope, she wasnothaving it. She just wanted to be held, and she wanted movement. So that's what we did—for hours—Jayda wondering if Gabby's ears were bothering her.

I couldn't be sure. But one thing I did know? It was killing me inside as the minutes dragged on and on. Of course, my daughter always came first, but right now, I just wanted to talk to Jayda, touch her, be with her.

Finally, at about eleven, with Jayda nearly asleep on the couch next to me, Gabby shut her eyes and stopped fighting sleep. I waited a few extra minutes to let her fall deeper as I also watched Jayda's eyes closing. And then, like I was performing the most delicate surgery, I walked carefully up the stairs and put her in the crib, tiptoeing away and swearing at the creaky hardwood floors.

Thank God she stayed asleep as I crept back downstairs, now concerned about waking up Jayda. I stared at her on the couch, sound asleep, and my heart sped up at how beautiful she was to me. How long had I admired that face? How long had I dreamed of that body?

The way her long lashes rested against her skin, the flush in her full cheeks, the way her wide mouth curved.

But more than that, I'd dreamed abouther. Just her. How she always made me feel good. Something about her... I didn't know. It was like she gave off a vibe, if that was the right word, that made anyone around her happy and positive. She was genuinely thebest personI had ever known.

I rubbed my forehead, not sure what to do. Traveling with Gabby had wiped me out. And obviously, Jayda was tired too. I had been dying to talk to her, dying to kiss every inch of her soft skin, and damn, what I wanted to do with all those curves of hers.

Just thinking about it made me hot. Ever since that weekend, I couldn't get her body out of my mind—her soft lips, her incredible breasts against my bare skin, how her hands had explored my own body, shy at first but then gripping me with need.

Holy heck. I needed yet another cold shower.

Letting out a shaky sigh, I walked over to her and pulled up the blanket to cover her. More than anything, I was disappointed we couldn't just talk. I'd never felt so comfortable with anyone in my life. No one. Asshat that I was, I had even felt that as a teenager. She was someone I didn't have to pretend with.

I stared at her a few more minutes, watching her chest rise and fall, noticing the way her skin was almost calling out for me to caress it.

Should I wake her? Would she be upset if I did? Or if I didn't?

Not only did I want to be with her right now, I had really been determined to dig a bit deeper and try to figure out if I was just being paranoid earlier or if there really was something going on that I needed to worry about.

In the end, she looked so peaceful, I decided to walk away, swallowing my bitter disappointment.

Chapter Fifteen

Alex

In the morning, Gabby stirring in her crib woke me up. And for a split second, I wondered where I was. Alone in this large bed in Jayda's house. Not exactly how I had pictured it.

With two little kids around, I hadn't been expecting a repeat of the sex-fest we'd had six weeks ago. But I'd at least like a minute to kiss her, talk to her, and be alone with her.

Releasing a breath, I tried to recover from my disappointment about the night before which had seeped into the bright morning sunshine peeking through the windows next to me. I heard noises and voices downstairs like a little kid was trying to be quiet but not exactly being successful at it.

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