Page 22 of Shadows of Ruin

“You believe many things about me, Little Rebel,” he said softly. “And the longer we stay here, the more you’ll learn. The more you’ll hate me. But I meant every word I said to you.” Kade dropped my hair and skimmed his knuckles across my cheek tenderly. “Every touch. Every pleasure-filled sound. Every damn moment between us was real. I may have hidden truths from you, but I never lied. Except that night, when I told you I was there for a queen.” His voice trembled over the last few words.

I stopped breathing, watching as Kade pulled his hands away, and his shadows.

“I was only there for you,” he whispered.

He turned, walking away and leaving me alone.

I shivered from his absence. As much as I hated him, every time he retreated, something in me broke further. It shouldn’t be possible, seeing as everything I loved had been taken from me. What else was possibly left to feel such pain?

Kade Blackthorn’s presence should have filled me with fire, with a rage so fierce, it would warm me until he died just like my father.

Instead, his absence triggered a horrible sorrow. This festering, wretched pain I couldn’t work through lessened around him, which must be his shadows or magic keeping emotions at bay when he was near. That was the only explanation as to why the stabbing ache in my chest returned full force as soon as he disappeared from sight.

I fell to my knees, reliving the death of Elisabeth, of my father. Watching the nightmare in my mind of losing Brookmere. I’d conjured horrors in my head at what happened to Ian, my mother. No news of the palace meant no way of knowing what Andras had done.

Instead of fighting harder to destroy Kade myself and return to my people, my remaining family, I kept losing my nerve. I craved the respite from the pain his nearness brought, yet all of this was his fault.

I breathed deeper, heavier, as I let that hatred consume me. Hating myself for my body’s reactions to him was enough to fuel that fire for now.

I planned on using it to hurt him the second he let his guard down. If he remained distracted talking with Storm or the others, instead of watching my tent, I’d have a chance to sneak away.

Tomorrow night, I told myself. Tomorrow, I’d prevent Kade from following me, and then I’d return home. No matter what.

Chapter 7

Ian

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The dripping hadn't stopped in years.

No matter how much time passed, the noise still haunted me. The echo in the frigid dungeonas the water splashed against the cold stone crawled along my spine. Not because of fear for myself.

No. The dripping meant she needed me. It meant she was hurting.

But I was no longer a young Fae. This time I was older, stronger.

I knew what it took.

I was not some pawn. Certainly not his pawn despite the way he ranted on and on in front of the Fae of Ellevail.

My body twitched against the cold stone. I blinked, letting my eyes acclimate to what my mind already knew—I remained in the dungeons.

Images flashed one at a time, but in the same repeating loop. This room and the torture Andras had bestowed on Lana.

Fates, Lan.

I had to get out of here and find her.

I balled my hand into a fist at the thought of the betrayal she must be experiencing. I’d failed to protect her when she needed it most. All of us duped by Kade and Storm, their friendship a farce for a bigger plan we couldn’t possibly have seen.

Never again.

The darkness of the dungeon didn't reveal much, but I knew all too well I’d been thrown into the same cell we had always been tossed into after being tortured.

---