Page 44 of Secret Hudson

“I’ve always known you had a great heart behind all of that sarcastic, crass commentary you sprinkle around so heavily everywhere you go. We’ve all known. The way you’ve loved all of us, has made that much clear. But then I saw you with Hudson. And I saw this. And there are no words...” his voice breaks off, but it doesn’t matter. I understand. I see it too. For the first time in my life. I see it. I see what it looks like to be loved, by me. And it isn’t horrific. Or ugly. Or abnormal. It’s just love. Beautiful. Real. Love.

I take in a loud breath of air and take a fast step forward, placing myself directly under that last spotlight.

“I know you were probably saving this spot for yourself,” I say quietly, watching while Hudson stops in surprise. “But, Ithink, no, I know, it’s time I shared something here tonight.” In lieu of a picture to hold, I reach for his hands instead. “I didn’t think I’d ever be here. I just, I honestly didn’t think it would ever happen for me. That night I told you that no one would ever be more important to me than these people standing here beside me, or the music that saved me and made me who I am today...I meant it. I believed it.” I look down at his hand in mine, my thumb stroking the back of his nervously.

“The thing is though, I only thought that because I didn’t know any better. As much as I love my family and my music, I simply couldn’t imagine ever loving anything or anyone more. I just didn’t think it was possible. Then I fell in love with you. And everything else paled in comparison.” I can feel the fucking lump rising in my throat again and I know I’m about to totally lose my shit. It’s now or never.

“The fact that you would do this for me, that you would set this whole thing up...there’s no denying my heart is better off in your hands than it’s ever been in my own. So, keep it. And trade me. Trust me with yours and, I swear, I’ll guard it with my life. I’ll spend every day from here on out, trying to figure out a way to make you feel as loved as you’ve made me feel here tonight.” I stupidly dare one more glance around the room, before my eyes lock onto the man in front of me, and I drop down on one knee.

“Marry me, Kieran Hudson. Marry me.”

An arrangement of gasps echoes around the room, and I see Ava out of the corner of my eyes as she clasps Blaise’s hand, trying desperately to keep from jumping up and down like a fucking five-year-old at Disney Land. But those are minor distractions, none of which sway my focus.

There’s only one thing that matters right now. Hudson’s answer.

HUDSON

I can’t move. I can’t talk. I’m not entirely sure I’m even still breathing. Isn’t until I feel the dampness on my skin and realize I’m crying that I know for certain I haven’t blacked out and am subsequently experiencing an outer body type of phenomenon.

“How did you know?” I barely recognize my own voice. Nothing else has ever overwhelmed me to the point of such a physical reaction before.

“How did I know what?” Royce is still down on his knee, holding my hand and, in spite of the open-ended proposal I still haven’t answered, he’s smiling back at me.

I hold up the photo I brought and shockingly managed to cling to with my free hand through the temporary body shut down.

I take a deep breath to steady my tone enough to get the words out. “That what I love most about you is the way you continue to surprise me.”

I watch as his eyes travel from my mouth to the picture at my chest and the expression on his face is perfect.

“That’s fucked up.” He actually laughs and the sound of it sets me at ease like nothing else could.

“What? Tell me this doesn’t capture surprised better than anything else you’ve ever seen.” I flip the picture back to look at it for what’s probably the hundredth time. I took it inAustralia, that morning on the boat when Royce about jumped overboard at the sight of the whale popping up to greet him.

He nods, still grinning. “Say yes and I’ll top it right now.”

“You don’t have to do this,” I whisper.

He smiles back at me. “Yes, I do. Because if I don’t ask you to marry me, if I don’t beg you to be mine, I’ll spend the rest of my life regretting it. I love you. And, honestly, that’s just not something I could hide now even if I wanted to.”

“You want to marry me. Just like that?”

“I do. The only question is, do you want to marry me?”

“Of course, I do.”

I bend down and pulled him back up to his feet, my mouth landing on his before he even stands up straight. In a blur, I realize Ava has been unleashed and is bouncing all around the room, while the others let out enthusiastic sounds of approval and surround us with congratulatory pats on the back.

In a million years, I never expected the evening to turn out this way. But then, I’ve never been less disappointed that a night didn’t go according to plan.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

ROYCE

“What do you think?” I hold up the band for Ava to see.

“I think I’m going to fucking cry again.” She leans so far into my lap, her nose is almost touching the ring.

“Well, if you’re about to start snotting all over the place, you need to back the fuck up.” I laugh and carefully put the wedding band back into its little velvet box. “Now, you’re not going to lose this, right?”

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