Page 49 of Forget Me Not

“I don’t know what’s going on, Cooper, but I’m pretty sure you have nothing to be sorry about,” he says softly. “I should apologize for rushing things, for rushing you. For me it feels like the last seven years didn’t even exist. Like, I only just woke up from the accident and hardly any time has passed since we were...us.”

I loosen my grip on the handle and allow the door to slack open a bit more. “A few days ago, you were engaged to someone else, Reed. Are you really able to walk away from the life you built in the years we were apart so easily?”

He smiles meekly. “The last few years of my life were a sham, Cooper. Everything that happened just feels like a big lie right now, and honestly, I’d just as soon forget them along with everything else I can’t remember.” His head tilts to the side, curiosity peaking in his eyes. “This isn’t about us, is it. It’s about Gun.”

“Please don’t be mad,” I sputter, torn between slamming the door shut again to hide behind it and tearing it open to drop down at his feet and beg him for understanding and, probably, forgiveness.

“I’m not mad.” But his words are clipped and he’s avoiding my gaze entirely now. “I get it, you moved on. Backtracking is going to be messy for a while.” His head turns up again and suddenly I’m pinned into place by a piercing stare. “That’s why I think we should move.”

“Excuse me?” I suck in air so rapidly, I nearly choke on my own breath trying to catch it.

“Think about it, babe. This place totally represents the life you had without me. My place isn’t an option since Sam is living there. I just think if we’re going to do this, we need to do it right. A fresh start. A home, for us. A place where we can build from instead of tripping over the rubble of past relationships.”

I understand what he’s saying. I really do. “This isn’t just my home, Reed. It’s my business, too. My shop is right downstairs.”

“People commute for work every day, Cooper,” he reasons.

But, I like not having to. I like being able to take a stroll down the stairs with my coffee in hand to go to work. I like it even more that I can take a stroll up the stairs to grab lunch from my own kitchen. I like that it’s never a problem if I get to work and forgot something. That I can go and take a twenty-minute nap if it’s slow. And I like that Cammie’s my neighbor. I like that I don’t have to lock my front door because the only people with access to this building have always had access to my life. The list goes on and on, but there’s really no point in it unless I’m just in it for the self-torture of it all. None of my reasons are Reed’s. And more importantly, I can’t come up with a single one why living here would be beneficial to him. Outside of being with me. And I can move. I. Can. Move.

“Okay.” I nod my head up and down as if I need to make sure I can physically feel myself agreeing. Something swirls at the pit of my stomach. Guilt. Guilt because I don’t want this. Guilt because I should. Guilt because I chose this, and for a split second there, I regretted it.

Chapter Thirteen

Gun

7Years Earlier

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“Iwas really hoping not to meet under these circumstances again, Gun,” Mr. B says grimly pulling up a chair to have a seat across from me. “It smells like piss in here.”

I noticed that, too. Mostly because the other guy in my holding cell was drenched in urine and no one has offered him a change of pants yet. Judging by the lingering odor in here, this is where he met with his public defender prior to my being summoned in by Mr. B.

“You didn’t have to come,” I point out the obvious. Frankly, I wasn’t expecting him to.

“Are we really going to have this conversation again?” He’s angry, but not as angry as he should be. I fucked up. Everything he handed to me, I threw away. Without even giving it a second thought. But I’m not sorry. I’ll never be sorry.

“You can’t fix this.” No one can. “I’m a week out from being eighteen. I’ve got priors a mile long. They’ll move to try me as an adult, and we both know how it’ll turn out.” I shrug. “I’m done.”

“And you’re, what, okay with that?” He slides back into his seat, glaring at me incredulously.

“Yeah,” I nod, never once breaking eye contact, “I am. If this is all I ever do with my life, it was worth it.”

His eyes narrow and his lips press together in a grim expression. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do.”

“What about Cooper? Who’s going to look out for her if you spend the rest of your life in prison?”

It’s the first time I have to avert my eyes. Mr. B knows how to throw ‘em. “She’ll be fine now. She’s in love with the kind of guy who can give her the world. She’s happy.”

He shifts around, leaning forward, elbows resting on the table so he can bore into me with his stare a little better. “Think she’ll still be happy when she finds out what you did? Where you are now because of it?”

I kick my feet out, throwing myself against the backrest of my cold, metal chair. “She doesn’t need to know.”

He laughs harshly. “And how the hell do you plan to keep this from her? You don’t think she’ll notice when you don’t come home?”

I shrug. “I’ll call her. Tell her I got a full-time gig here. She’ll believe me.”

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