Page 41 of Forget Me Not

“Do I like Reed McAllister?” I laugh. “We don’t exactly hang in the same circles, Coop. But sure, what’s not to like, right?” I bump Ed with my elbow, trying to include him in this exchange to ease the weird tension this conversation is causing.

Ed snorts. “His sister, for one thing. That chick is crazy.”

Cooper frowns. “Who’s his sister?”

I’d answer, except I’ve never met her.

“Kerri. She graduated last year, but before that,everyonein school knew who she was. That girl was a commuter train to Crazyville, stopping every five minutes to pick up more suckers stupid enough to make the trip.” Ed reaches into the bag of pretzels on my lap and pulls out a handful. “Now, I’m not saying you’re dumb enough to jump on board, but you should know, that’s not going to stop her from jumpin’ the tracks and plowing your skinny ass over if she gets wind you’re dating her little brother.”

She shrugs. “I can handle crazy. That’s pretty much the only area I’m qualified in.” She twists around in her seat, lifting up to sit on her legs for more height and a better, more demanding angle as she continues to prod us. “But what about Reed? Are you guys saying you wouldn’t hang out with him? If he was with me?”

I sigh. “Listen Coop, whether we want to be buddies with your new big crush or not is a non-issue. He could be the coolest dude in the world, and I still wouldn’t tell you to start planning group playdates.”

Her big blue eyes give the distinct impression of a set prepping to disperse daggers, and her rounded little nose crinkles with dissatisfaction. “Why not?”

I arch my brow. She can’t be serious. “Because, Coop. The last thing a guy wants to find when he shows up to hang with a girl he’s into, is two other dudes. Just trust me on this. You’ll be better off if we keep our distance. At least for the time being.”

“Fine,” she huffs, yanking the pretzels from my grip and stomping her way out of the living room. From the sound of her footsteps, she’s headed for the kitchen. I’d yell for her to bring me a drink, but odds are, right about now, she’d toss it at my head before giving it to me like a civilized person.

“What was that?” Ed asks, reaching for the remote to mute the game. Apparently, we’re about to have a serious sort of conversation.

“What are you talking about? You were there. Cooper likes Reed McAllister.”

He nods dramatically. “Yeah. That part I got. What the hell was that bullshit you said about us staying outta their way so he doesn’t get his little panties in a wad?”

“You saying he wouldn’t?” Let’s be real. I haven’t met a guy at our school yet who wouldn’t be intimidated, if not shitting his pants, if he showed up to take Cooper on a date and found me and Ed standing right behind her, ready to tag along and watch their every move.

“I’m saying, that’s not the reason you’re backing off. You don’t give a rat’s ass if Reed is uncomfortable.”

I lean my head back to listen for Cooper. Everything is still quiet.

“Of course I don’t care about Reed. This isn’t for him. It’s for her. She likes him and I don’t wanna screw it up for her.”

“Bullshit,” he starts up again.

“Not bullshit.” Probably the lamest comeback in the history of arguments.

“This has nothing to do with them. This, is about you.” Ed leans in closer and lowers his voice, “You’re a fucking coward. Admit it. You can’t tell her how you feel, but you can’t fucking face seeing her with someone else either.”

“Ah. I see now how you know that Kerri chick. You’ve been riding her crazy train.” I yank the remote from his hand, preparing to put a stop to this stupid conversation. “I don’t have feelings like that for Cooper.”

“What kind of feelings are they then exactly?”

I point the remote at the TV and pause. “The kind you have for someone you meet locked in a closet when you’re nine, sitting in the pitch black, drenched in your own damn pee, starving and fucking terrified.”

“Don’t give me that shit.” He waves his hand as if he could dismiss everything I’ve just said so easily. “You’ve been through hell and back with this girl. And yeah, the hell parts were ugly as fuck, but you and I both know you’d go to hell and stay there if it meant she didn’t have to go again. If that’s not love, what exactly do you think it is?”

I want to press my finger down on the volume so badly it hurts, but I can’t. It’s just locked into place, resting right above it, unable to move. “It’s not love. At least not the sort of fairytale crap she’s looking for.”

Ed still won’t shut up though. “How can you be so sure?”

“Because,” I bite out through clenched teeth, “Nothing that pretty can come from the ugly shit that brought us together. Fine, we’re bonded for life. So what?! She deserves better. She deserves the fucking fairy tale. A real life fucking love story she can tell her grandkids someday, And I’ll be damned before I ever let it start with ‘once upon a time, in a dark, dirty closet’.”

My anger is all the drive I need to finally push that button down. The ball game is practically bouncing off the walls when Cooper walks back in the room, still clutching the pretzels in one hand and having added a glass of chocolate milk in the other. She’s weird like that. And Reed better fucking appreciate it.

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Reed

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