Page 97 of Finding Lord Landry

Kenji grimaced but sat up, crossing his legs. “And that’s true. Imagine you begin to care about someone and find out a decade later they didn’t trust you with an entire part of themselves.”

The vulnerability in his voice made my heart ache, even as it soared at his quiet admission of affection.

“I’m sorry, Kenji. I’m sorry I kept something so important from you.” I shifted, sitting up against the headboard. “Part of me worried that if I began to talk about it in my American life, it would make it real and bring this timeline closer when I wasn’t ready. Mostly, I was terrified my lies would confirm every negative thought you had about me and you’d be done with me for good.”

Kenji moved closer, pulling our joined hands into his lap, above the duvet he’d yanked over our legs. “I was hurt when I found out,” he admitted. “I thought it meant I wasn’t important enough or that you didn’t trust me.”

“It was the exact opposite—” I began, but he stopped me with a smile and a raised hand.

“Iknowneither of those things are true. I overheard you talking to Zane on the phone, and I get it now.” He took a breath. “Being here at Hawling House with your family—flipping through photo albums and hearing stories—makes me realize just how lonely it must have been. Your parents were so much older than everyone else’s, which probably added to the formality and the weight of expectation on you. Even at Eton, you would have been surrounded by social pressure based purely onwhoyou were, nothowyou were.”

Kenji squeezed my fingers. “No wonder you were so afraid to tell us.”

“I’d never had friends like the guys before,” I admitted, feeling thready vestiges of that fear even saying it out loud. “What if they’d turned out to be like all the snobby assholes I’d grown up with? And it wasn’t just my surname. People in the peerage judged me for having an American mother, too. As Zane’s gran would say, ‘I couldn’t win for losin’.’ And then, once I knew they were good guys, I was terrified of losing them because I’d lied.”

“You never actually lied.” Kenji arched an eyebrow. “Believe me, I raked through my memories, trying to build aliar-liarcase against you, and I came up empty.However, I will now be submitting those fake hookup NDAs as exhibits one through ten thousand. Asshole.”

I pulled him into my lap, wrapping my arms around him as he straddled me. “I plead guilty,” I said softly. “If you need more evidence, I also lied every time I acted like I was okay with a purely physical relationship with you.”

Kenji bit his lip. “Then it’s my turn to apologize.”

“What the hell for?” I asked, surprised.

“I never gave you a chance because I misjudged you. I thought you were reckless and shallow. A playboy who’d never commit, never take anything seriously, never be capable of devotion to his family. I was wrong. Impossibly wrong. And I’m sorry.” His gaze roamed over my face. “I’m also sorry my rescue moved up your timeline.”

I cupped his face and kissed him softly. “Nan was already pressuring me to come back. My dad needs to retire. They wouldn’t have been able to wait much longer.” I shrugged. “It was always going to happen at some point.”

“It’syourchoice, Landry.” Kenji hesitated like he wanted to say more but instead gave me a brilliant smile. “But if it’s what you want, then I’m fucking here for it. I can help you accomplish your legacy, leave your own mark. You’ll make an excellent MP, and I will make an excellent MP’s spouse.” He straightened, all business. “If you need to see my CV, I have extensive experience supporting great men’s careers. Public relations, event planning, charitable endeavors, scheduling… I do it all.” His smile turned mischievous. “Even the occasional posting of bail.”

I barked out a laugh. “That was one time, Kenji. And there?—”

“Three times, Landry,” he sighed. “Three. What the fuck? How do you not remember being arrested two out of three times in your life?”

I ticked them off on my fingers. “The first didn’t count because the airline decided not to press charges in the end.”

“They banned you for life!”

I scrunched up my face. “Yet they’ll still take my money for your first-class seats. Don’t think I didn’t notice and write them a strongly worded letter.”

“And the second?” he asked, unable to keep from rolling his eyes.

“That’s the one you actually posted bail for. And there were… extenuating circumstances.” I deliberately didn’t explain further. “As for the third and most recent, you weren’t even there. And that one I also had a good reason for, if you’ll recall. I was trying to let Zane get into a little trouble without getting into a lot of trouble like he wanted.”

“Go back to the middle one,” he said, narrowing his eyes. “Tell me what really happened. I always had a sense there was more to that story.”

I scratched my neck and moved him off my lap. It was easier to focus when I wasn’t distracted by his body. “Remember the Vencari contract a few years ago? The one where I did a catalog cover shoot, then Milan Fashion Week, then a shoot for a big formalwear ad spread?”

He frowned, trying to place it.

“And then suddenly, they added a swimsuit shoot and tried to pretend it was a language mix-up?”

I could tell by the sudden twitch of his jaw he remembered. “That guy was an ass, and your agent was even worse. Wasn’t that the job that led to you hiring Lamar?”

I nodded. “That guy—the one who hired me, not my old agent—cornered me in a hotel room and tried to have his wicked way with me. I decided to turn it into a fistfight instead.”

Kenji stared at me. “Please, baby. Please tell me you’re pulling my leg right now.”

I shrugged. “Wish I was.”

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